[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.
his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields. his fear that things will never change. more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.
a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.
he doesn't know how to put it all into words.
nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]
cw. mention of sexual assault
[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.
his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields.
his fear that things will never change.
more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.
a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.
he doesn't know how to put it all into words.
nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]
I don't know. I...
[ he closes his eyes. ]
I want to say yes. You have no idea how much.