Remember we talked about our dreams? You dreamt the sun? I dreamt the stars? ( this is so weird, but... ) There's also a girl there. In the field, watching the stars.
We don't have books in the fields, we don't have pictures or anything like that. I've never even seen an impression, so how?
There's something more to these dreams. I knew it the last time we talked about it, and I couldn't have told you why. I still can't. But they're more than dreams, I can feel it.
lexi does, honestly, fit with his assessment of what a vampire is, and wants. logically, he isn't different. he wants power at any cost, he'll stand on the backs of others to get it. he's angry for good reason, he wants revenge. and he's outwardly said he won't do anything different in their world, won't change anything for dani's people. won't make any of the bad any better.
dani shouldn't support him.
and yet, because it's lexi, he does. better him than any of the others, because it's him. ]
I'll help you get there. I promise, we'll stop the ones who hurt your family. All of them.
[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.
his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields. his fear that things will never change. more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.
a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.
he doesn't know how to put it all into words.
nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]
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That voice, from your first night. It never came back?
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Remember we talked about our dreams? You dreamt the sun? I dreamt the stars? ( this is so weird, but... ) There's also a girl there. In the field, watching the stars.
Her voice reminds me of that first time.
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he dreamed the sun. ]
What does she say in the dreams?
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She says we're almost there.
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Almost where?
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fuck. ]
Lexi, you've seen how the sun looks here, right? On videos, and such.
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It looked exactly the same in my dreams.
Exactly the same. And it felt the same. Like home.
[ he shakes his head. ]
How could I have known any of that without seeing it?
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[ it's weird. how could he get it so right? ]
We don't have books in the fields, we don't have pictures or anything like that. I've never even seen an impression, so how?
There's something more to these dreams. I knew it the last time we talked about it, and I couldn't have told you why. I still can't. But they're more than dreams, I can feel it.
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Maybe... here we can have time to learn. Understand. Go home better prepared.
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[ he sits back, thoughtful. ]
And there's no voice that speaks to me. It's all just feelings.
Can you question the woman? Find out what she wants?
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I'd fight her on it, but I never can reach her when I want to. And I do need the Chalice.
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[ but there's clearly more to all this. he chews his lip. ]
Maybe a witch could help us look into it.
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[ he watches lexi. ]
We don't have to tell him more than you want to.
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He'll need to know enough to study appropriately.
I... think he can be trusted.
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If we're on this path for a reason I want to know who put us there.
It all seems so much bigger than us.
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I won't let anyone else take that from me again.
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lexi does, honestly, fit with his assessment of what a vampire is, and wants. logically, he isn't different. he wants power at any cost, he'll stand on the backs of others to get it. he's angry for good reason, he wants revenge. and he's outwardly said he won't do anything different in their world, won't change anything for dani's people. won't make any of the bad any better.
dani shouldn't support him.
and yet, because it's lexi, he does. better him than any of the others, because it's him. ]
I'll help you get there. I promise, we'll stop the ones who hurt your family. All of them.
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And then you'll still choose to go off and die alone?
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he wants to say yes.
more and more, that feels like a lie. ]
I don't want to leave you.
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cw. mention of sexual assault
[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.
his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields.
his fear that things will never change.
more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.
a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.
he doesn't know how to put it all into words.
nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]
I don't know. I...
[ he closes his eyes. ]
I want to say yes. You have no idea how much.
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