abyssale | 𝖘𝖆𝖑𝖙𝖇𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖙 𝖎𝖓𝖇𝖔𝖝.

( he squeezes his hand. ) I don't care who put us here. In the end, I'm the one that's going to be in control of it all.

I won't let anyone else take that from me again.

[ dani nods.

lexi does, honestly, fit with his assessment of what a vampire is, and wants. logically, he isn't different. he wants power at any cost, he'll stand on the backs of others to get it. he's angry for good reason, he wants revenge. and he's outwardly said he won't do anything different in their world, won't change anything for dani's people. won't make any of the bad any better.

dani shouldn't support him.

and yet, because it's lexi, he does. better him than any of the others, because it's him. ]

I'll help you get there. I promise, we'll stop the ones who hurt your family. All of them.

( every time they get this close... )

And then you'll still choose to go off and die alone?

[ he hesitates, as he always does.

he wants to say yes.

more and more, that feels like a lie. ]

I don't want to leave you.

But you will? ( he asks. )

Lexi.

[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.

his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields.
his fear that things will never change.
more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.

a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.

he doesn't know how to put it all into words.

nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]

I don't know. I...

[ he closes his eyes. ]

I want to say yes. You have no idea how much.

Then say it. ( Lexi pushes.

he shouldn't. he didn't mean to. but every time he thinks to the future... he can't help but associate Dani's death with it now. it's all he thinks about. it's consuming him. )

Say it for me. If nothing else, do it for me, Dani. I'm begging you.

[ the more he's pushed, the more he wants to fight it, even while there's a fight going on inside him, too.

he doesn't want to lose lexi. but he'll lose him either way, won't he? ]

I...

[ he shakes his head. ]

Tell me everything would be the same. Tell me we'd be the way we are here, today, that people would look at me and see a person and not a blood bag. Tell me that I'd be fighting the system that hurt my people and not part of it.

Tell me that and I'll say yes right now.

( his heart breaks into a thousand pieces in that request. )

I can't. They'll kill us. Or worse, they'll kill you and force me to be their king still.

[ yeah.

that's what he thought. dani's expression carries the weight of his sadness, full of pain and guilt. ]

I know.

We'd have to play a role. Mine would make me less than a person. You love this me, Lexi, would you even want the man I'd have to pretend to be?

You wouldn't have to change your behavior. You'd be mine. You could behave however you wished, no one could reproach you.

You just couldn't enact change. That's where it would end.

[ you'd be mine.

those words are so incredibly hard to turn from. he wants to be lexi's. the moments when he feels happy, and secure, and untouchable, are always moments in lexi's arms.

he looks at him, exhales. ]

My people would hate me. They'd be right to.

And even knowing that, I don't know that I could walk away from you. I think that would be harder than anything I've done til now.

Then don't. ( Lexi grips his shirt, not dangerously. a plea. )

You heard what I lost. Don't make me lose you.

[ fuck.

dani stares at him. he saw that pain. he saw what it cost him.

could he fucking live with that, costing lexi that same pain again?

whatever he does, the guilt will eat at him. no decision is free of that.
but one keeps him with lexi. one lets him have that.

he pulls closer again, wrapping a hand around lexi's and reaching to hold his cheek with the other. ]

Okay.

Alright. After, I'll stay with you, I'll be yours. I'll stay.

( Lexi pulls him in tightly. he kisses him. hard. needily. a desperate rush to shut Dani up before anything else he won't like comes out of that beautiful mouth.

he'll stay.

that's all he needs. for Dani to stay. to live. )

[ it's a crushing kiss, and it matches everything they'd just gone through together. it's painful. heated.

it hurts the same way love does.

dani's arms wrap around him, in equal parts yielding to him and pressing back against him. his fingers rake through lexi's hair. ]

I'm sorry. [ said in gasped breaks between kisses. ] You're the last person I would hurt. The last.

( Lexi falls back into the grass, the blanket splaying out underneath him.

he pulls Dani with him, kissing him desperately. he shakes his head as he mutters between those kisses. ) Then don't leave me. Never leave me.

( his hands scratch down Dani's sides, pushing at his pants to try to pull them off him. )

[ dani's shirt is already gone. he doesn't recall shrugging it off, but when he leans over lexi he's only in the tee. he pulls that off, too, tosses it aside.

then works on lexi's kimono. every kiss, every touch, is urgent, desperate.

dani's pants get themselves gone, finally, and entirely naked, he sits astride lexi's hips. ]

I won't. Not ever.

[ he bends to him, kissing him again. his hands slide over his chest, pushing up his clothes. dani's naked and there's still too many clothes between them. ]

( in fairness, Lexi dresses light for a reason. he likes the ease with which the kimono slides off over his arms, bunching beneath him the same way the blanket now does.

and his pants are loose. they take little effort to untie so they can be kicked down.

and then he's naked under Dani, cock already hard for Dani.

Lexi's hand is out at his side, and it curls into a fist. Dani will feel the tug inside of him as his blood moves him, bringing him down to Lexi to kiss again. the grip is loosed the second he has those kisses. a tease of his powers and just what else they might do... )

[ the air leaves him as he's pulled back down. he kisses him back, hard cock twitching against lexi's stomach at the urgency of it. his heart is racing. understanding hits him a second later, and he grins, watching lexi with a whole new interest. ]

I could get used to that.

[ when it's not hurting him, that power is...something. he nudges lexi's chin with his nose. ]

You want to play with me? [ he's unafraid. he trusts lexi. ] What else can you do?

( Lexi grins wickedly back at him.

he runs a fang over Dani's lip and sighs. ) I don't know. I've never tried like this...

( he shakes his head. ) Later. When I'm more level.

Right now I just need- ( the hand at his side flicks it's fingers, pulling Dani's hips forward. interesting. ) You. In me. And I don't have the patience for it.

[ fuck, the sight of that fang--

dani really needs to fucking examine himself. and to be fair, there is absolutely no part of him that wants to do this now. there has been so much thinking, and feeling, and guilt, and weight.

the physical side has always been easy for them. no more thinking. lexi's right.

also, his impatience is noted. dani lifts his brows. ]

I've no lube, so you'd best know what you're asking.

[ but he does shift between lexi's legs, pushing his knees apart. he licks his fingers, then moves them between their bodies, dragging them back past lexi's taint. he pushes in against his hole, working the tight muscles until he can push his way between them. ]

( Lexi's legs part under Dani's easily. he raises them up over Dani's waist and wraps them around his waist to keep Dani from getting too far from him again.

Dani's fingers are in him suddenly and he groans. whines even. he's tight. he's always tight. and Dani's are thick in his ass. he arches his hips, using Dani's back to leverage himself to do so. his cock twitches against his stomach as he does and he shudders. )

I know what I said. ( Lexi grins at him with dark, dangerous eyes. )

[ dani loves that look.

grinning back, he wraps his free hand around lexi's shaft and strokes it, wanting to help him into this. he needs him to fucking relax, and he's tense in every sense of the word.

his fingers slide deeper. he turns them, hooks them. spits more lubrication down to his hand, moves his fingers apart, stretches lexi deeper. he's gonna start keeping the lube in his pocket, they rarely keep their hands to themselves now that they're here. now that they really do have as much time together as they'd like. gentle, he pulls his fingers back, and teases lexi's hole with a third. ]

( Lexi's hips jerk at the touch on his cock. he leaks pre at his tip that drips into Dani's strokes and make his length slicker under Dani's touch.

his throat makes a kreening sound as Dani works to stretch. he does need to relax.

he takes breathes, swallows the warm night air. forces his body to relent to Dani's pressure. then he feels that other finger. )

Hng- yes. More. ( Lexi begs. )

𝖘𝖆𝖑𝖙𝖇𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖙 𝖎𝖓𝖇𝖔𝖝.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

cw. mention of sexual assault

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)