abyssale | 𝖘𝖆𝖑𝖙𝖇𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖙 𝖎𝖓𝖇𝖔𝖝.

[ it's really only a cursory knock on Lexi's side of their bathroom, before Dani is pushing the door open and striding on in. he's looking at the phone in his hands which, frankly, is a mystery to him. ]

I need you to show me how to use this. Everyone stares at them all the time, and I can't do it.

[ hi Lexi here he is please deal with him ]

( lexi is lounging on the bed, looking at his own phone, when Dani barges in. )

By all means, don't wait for an invitation. ( he sasses, but it's not as serious as one might think.

he sits up to look at what Dani is struggling with. ) What can you do with it to start?

[ you're lucky he even knocked, this room feels largely like an extension of his own.

he goes straight to the bed and sits beside lexi, cross-legged, and gives him the phone. ]

Turn it on and off, scroll through... [ he gestures at the screen full of apps ] those. This.

[ he taps one of the apps and it opens, showing the network, with clickable posts. that's about as far as he's gotten, since a good lot of it is text posts, and they're gibberish to him. ]

( he sighs and sits up on the bed. ) Well you've managed to unlock it, so that's a good start. And you found the network, most people tend to use that.

( he holds up his own phone, screen facing Dani, to show on his own device. ) See, you move the screen by dragging your finger a direction. Play with it, you'll figure out the directions with time.

For the network, you touch what you want to look at. ( he touches on Astarion's post for example. ) As you can see, this one is written. ( he pushes a button. ) And clicking this button will make your screen go back to the previous page.

( now he scrolls through the screen until he finds a voice post. ) See this one? It has a a tiny picture next to the subject. This picture indicates that the post is given to us with someone's voice. ( he opens up the voice post and lets it start to play. ) Those ones don't require reading and you can interact with them. Answer them with your voice the way you did me before.

[ he looks closely, watching how lexi navigates it. with ease, apparently. that's frustrating. ]

But, I can't read. [ he looks up at lexi. ] When I answered you, your voice just came out of it, like you were there next to me. And I didn't make anything on the network for you to answer, you just found me. Somehow.

[ ...hmm. ]

How did you find me?

( Lexi sighs. ) That's why I am telling you to look at the pictures. You'll need those. Ignore the written ones and look for the ones with picture that indicates the voice.

And I found you because there's a database of everyone in Saltburnt on this phone for contact purposes. I was perusing it and your name was suddenly on the list.

( he raises an eyebrow at him. ) I could show you, but honestly not everything has pictures for you to use to find things. You'll need to learn to read.

[ dani stares at him. he might as well have just told him to learn magic for how simple that sounds. ]

I...don't know where to start, I.

[ okay, that's. That's a problem for another time. He shakes his head. ]

Alright, well just show me the pictures to look for, then. If I answer one of those things, will they know who I am?

They will. A picture of you and your name on the network will show for them. Like this. ( he opens up the voice post again and scrolls down to show a response. ) Again, this picture means that there will be voice.

( he scrolls down to a video response. ) This one means there will be video and voice. Video is like moving pictures. These are the types of things you can respond to without reading.

( he scrolls back up and shows Dani two buttons on the post. ) The left button means you want to send them a message back. Click it and it will ask if you want to write a message, record your voice, or record a video. Again, find the pictures of the voice and the video to choose to send those options.

[ he leans in to watch. there's more gibberish on the screen, which he presumes is the thing asking him what he wants to do. he chews his lip. there's definitely a barrier here. it's more than the technology not making sense. the gibberish matters, there was a whole element of this that he wasn't understanding. ]

Okay. I understand, so this makes it open and then that's for answering.

And, is there a way I can send...videos and voice, on this thing? [ there is, there must be. this is why people have their heads in the devices all the time. ]

I just showed you how to select it. It will automatically turn on recording of voice or yourself when you do. ( he pushes the button for recording a voice. ) You just speak normally, then push it again to stop and send it.

( then he pushes for the video ) This one is for the video. ( the front facing camera turns on and he turns it towards Dani. ) Wave.

Yeah. Right, sorry.

[ he needs to memorise those little symbols. this is going to take a minute.

but then it's pointing at him and he sits up straight, eyes big like there's a weapon trained on him. he offers up the most stilted, uncomfortable wave known to man. ]

Like that?

Didn't ask you to apologize. I was just reiterating.

See how you can see yourself on the screen waving? ( he brings it a bit closer for Dani. )

[ he stops waving, and stares at the screen. he puts a finger on his cheek. pushes it in. tilts his head, stares at it.

it's like a reflection, but not. it's weird.

and then, suddenly, alarmed eyes turn back to lexi. ]

They can't see me right now, can they?!

( ... that makes him laugh.

he shakes his head. ) Not until you tell it to send the video to the other person.

Okay.

[ relief.

panic abating.

he almost reaches for the device, then stops. ]

Wait, show me how to find your name on the list of people. Show me what it looks like.

( ah. fair.

he shows him how to navigate to find the list, then pulls down the list going until he finds it. ) This one is me. ( he points to a picture of himself. ) Those for symbols? The letters. They spell Lexi. Anytime you see those four letters together like that, that's how you read my name.

[ okay. those shapes, in that order. the cross in the middle. the line with the dot on top at the end.

he nods. ]

Alright.

[ a beat.

then softer, curious. ]

Show me what mine looks like.

( ... he pulls back and goes up again until he finds Dani's picture. ) It says Dani, not Daniil. But this is how you write Dani.

[ he looks at that for a long time. that's how you write dani.

of course he has not actually written it, that being another thing he doesn't know how to do. but he's also never seen the shape of his own name. ]

Dani's okay. That's what you call me.

The end is the same. The line with the dot, the same as yours. Dani, Lexi. That's the 'eeee' sound.

( he nods his head. ) That letter with the line and dot is called an 'I'. It makes the 'eee' sound when it's at the end of the word like that.

[ dani looks up at him, nods. this is how the letter i became the first one he ever knew. ]

Only when it's at the end?

What if it's... [ he scrolls a bit, then points to 'alina'. ] in the middle? Like here.

Edited 2024-08-18 23:46 (UTC)

( .... really. he would have to pick Alina. ) That name is Alina. It does make the 'eee' sound but for a different reason. ( he purses his lips. ) It gets a little more complicated... you really need the basics to continue.

( a glance at Alina's dumb face again. ) Also, don't talk to Alina. I've spoken with her and she has terrible manners. Absolutely feral.

[ is learning how to read names not the basics? that seems pretty basic, hang on til he just sasses lexi about th-- ]

You've made an enemy already? We've only just arrived, how is that even possible?

( Lexi looks up at him and furrows his brow. ) She has terrible manners, I just explained it. I can't account for why she is like she is, but I'm doing you a favor sparing you a conversation with her.

[ dani eyes him, then reaches for the device. ]

Well, what did she say to you, let me see. Is it somewhere on this?

( yeah here's the thing. ) You can find my name and picture on the network, but the post I made was written in text. And the conversation Alina and I had was all in text, as well.

( he waves his hand dismissively. ) She started by asking me about the knots of werewolf cocks and if they were real.

[ a frustrated exhale. ]

I have to get around this text thing, it's more than half of them! I'm going to miss-

[ ears catching up with brain. ]

--is that a thing you know?

( Lexi shrugs. ) I'm over 200 years old. Of course I know. And yes, werewolves have knots on their dicks.

( he raises a hand to stop Dani. ) And before you ask, no. I have never taken a knot nor even fucked a werewolf.

[ wow and he thought you were kinky. ]

Why not? If I were over 200, I'd have fucked a werewolf and taken a knot, this is disappointing.

[ head tilt. ]

D'you think you couldn't handle it?

( excuse him. )

I know I could handle it. ( and yes the fantasy is there... ) But the Blood Prince doesn't get fucked by dogs.

[ brows lifting right up. gods, but his opinion of himself makes so much more sense now. ]

Not with that attitude. I bet they'd be up to it. Might even be feral.

Maybe I'd like this Alina.

( all those times Dani wondered at the ego on Lexi suddenly makes sense with new eyes. )

You're so contrary. If I told you not to jump off a bridge, you'd dive headfirst.

[ dani points at him. ]

Not true, I just know you like to insult the things you like.

Have you fought with anyone else? I want to see the post you made, read it to me.

Edited 2024-08-19 00:14 (UTC)

( he narrows his at that. ) I do not. My insults are well-earned.

And no I'm not reading the post to you. It's quite long and I don't feel like rehashing every word.

[ yeah, he stands by his previous statement.

but also, he reaches for lexi's wrist. ]

No, come on, I can't do it by myself. I've only learned half a letter and three names, and I wouldn't have done that without you.

( ...... don't you dare look at him with those fucking puppy dog eyes.

he sighs. ) If I read it to you, you have to refrain from commenting on the things i've said to others.

[ on one hand, that makes him extremely curious about what lexi has said to others.

on the other hand, if he doesn't play nice, he won't get to know what lexi has said to others.

so. ]

Alright. I'll absolutely...try very hard not to say anything.

[ he scooches a bit closer, shoulder to shoulder. leans in. ]

I will literally gag you with a tie to keep you quiet if you talk. ( he looks at him from the corner of his eyes as they get closer. )

[ sensing that this is a trap, he pretends to button his lips closed, and smiles. look at him, he is behaving. continue please, your royal majesty. ]

Good boy.

( so.. Lexi reads him the post. it feels weird to read his own writing out loud like a bed time story. but he does it for Dani's benefit.

he reads each conversation... and he doesn't edit what he says to Dani. he'll parse it out eventually anyway. )

[ he listens, dutifully. there's a few moments when he starts to say something or makes a kind of worldless, disgusted sound, but he buttons himself again.

until the end. ]

Thank you.

[ then he punches lexi's arm. ]

You wrote on this network that you're the last survivor of your bloodline, and your name is on it, and anyone who's here can go and read it at any time? Are you mad?

( ...

this is not what he expected.

he raises an eyebrow at him. ) I can handle myself if anyone else from our world comes here and wants to make themselves a nuisance to me.

Really.

[ dani stares at him. the fucking ego on him-- ]

What if it's the King? Or really anyone in the royal line. What if it's more than one? There's two of us, we don't know who else might be brought. For all we know there's others already here.

( Lexi rolls his eyes and leans back against the frame of the bed. ) This place is different. That means different rules. I looked through the list. Even if anyone from our world is here they're not anyone I would consider a threat.

That also means I have the advantage of learning the rules here before anyone else arrives.

[ this is gonna be a struggle. ]

You're so used to being the strongest. You think nothing can hurt you. They're right, all those people who told you that you weren't being careful.

Humans used to think the same thing. They never imagined another species could come and take everything from them. Look where it got them.

[ we aren't so different, you and i. ]

I know what happened to humans. And I know how to be careful. I didn't survive my lineage's massacre by not being prepared.

( his gaze meets Dani's. ) Why are you so worried for me? My death would practically ensure humanity's freedom.

[ Oh now, that makes him laugh. ]

Everyone's thought you were dead for almost my whole life. I was two when your whole line 'died'. Where is this freedom we're supposed to have found?

( Lexi rolls his eyes. ) I'm talking about Agrafina and her plan to wipe out all vampires. Which includes me in the end, if you haven't guessed.

Killing me would just speed up her end results.

[ dani scoffs. ]

Well, yes, but she's not going to win.

And even if she did, that would just put the witches in charge. You think they'd free all the humans that they've never given a shit about? There's more of us than them, they're not stupid. They'd keep us controlled.

[ he pauses. he's quiet, but not at peace. there's some anxious energy in him, wanting to come out. ]

All those worlds where humans dominate, where they're free. That's not us. We had our chance, that's gone.

They would probably kinder to you all at least. ( why is he arguing against his own rule here? )

What do you imagine happens if I win?

[ the fact that he only found out about lexi's plan yesterday notwithstanding... ]

Nothing. Everything stays how it is.

Just like it did when the Dravens died. The only thing that changed for my people is what name we thank before we eat.

( he's not wrong. Lexi shouldn't feel... guilty about that. he hates to admit it, but as unfair as the system is on humans it has been keeping all populations alive in a world that is more than likely dying. )

I'd bring you with me.

[ dani looks up at him, brow furrowing. ]

What does that mean? Bring me where.

To the palace. When I ascend. ( he knows what he's offering is a pittance... )

[ to the palace.

what does it say about dani that he can't even picture it? ]

So that I would be...what.

Like.

Your pet?

( Lexi watches him with neutral eyes as he nods. ) Yes. Essentially, yes.

[ could he...do that?

he'd be king, in theory, so there wouldn't be anyone to stop him. and for all that he'd talked to poor alina about representation, the king was an absolute ruler.

so. in theory, he could.

dani doesn't know what to say. his lips move. his eyebrows lift, he looks away, then back at lexi, frowning. ]

Why? You could have anyone. The ones raised to it, they'd definitely punch you less.

( ... not the reaction Lexi expected to that revelation. )

Your punches don't hurt. ( he rolls his yes, relaxing slightly. )

And I like you most of anyone. I thought that obvious after our talk when you arrived?

[ that doesn't mean he understands it. ]

You could change things, though.

If you wanted. You could stop the Fields. The breeding program. Humans could learn how to read again. You could do that.

( ah. there it is.

Lexi shrugs and shakes his head. ) No I can't.

There is no version of this where humans allow themselves to be fed on. It's just a simple fact.

The system we've created has led to the most peace between our four species as is possible. The most lives saved. For all of us.

[ his head shakes.

now, that nervous energy is gone. ]

It's not peace, Lexi.

[ he pushes up his sleeve, revealing the track marks on his arms. ]

It's this. And it hurts. Our lives are needles and teeth, and we have no choice. And we have no voice. You said that we do. It's either a lie that you told or a lie you believed, and calling this 'peace' is the same.

[ he picks up his phone and moves away. ]

I have to go. Thank you. [ gesturing with the phone. ] For helping.

( Lexi doesn't stop him. doesn't move at all. he lets Dani get his piece out. take his phone. )

Ask again if you need help. ( is all he finally says before he picks up his own phone again to look through the network. )

they're letting me out today ... prognosis is a few weeks of no heavy activity

[ An image accompanies this message: a selfie of Matt in a hospital bed, bare-chested with the thin sheet pulled over his hips in case House pokes his head in. There's a green lotus tattoo over his heart, and another tattoo on his right hip depicting a half-monkey, half-man figure. There is also a bandage over his left side, a square of white gauze affixed with tape. ]

which I'm pretty sure means we're good to have sex if you're on top

<3

[ This text was ... supposed to go to somebody else. ]

well that was a very sudden expectation. but if you really like, i suppose i can manage gentle (:

[ Matt is reading along like haha, very funny, until something strikes him as ever so slightly off. He scrolls back up to the username, and-- ]

oh my god

I'm sorry

[ For the sext? For the potential gross-out of the bandage shot? ]

for the record I don't make a habit of randomly soliciting newcomers

aw. now i'm just disappointed ): ( is it rude to tease a man in the hospital?? probably. )

please, no need to apologize. it gave me a good laugh.

[ This is Matt's karmic retribution for bullying Dani into calling him cute. ]

Hmph ... that's good at least.

I hate disappointing people.

come out with me tonight

i'm not saying no.... but to where?

outside! you're always in the library
come and see the gardens and the maze
and then the observatory, there's a telescope

[ there's two words he didn't know a week ago. ]

you can see all the stars

i don't mean to disrupt your excitement, Dani... but what do you think i do at night when i'm not with you?

do you look at the stars?

i look at the moon.

yes of course, i understand that
i think she's beautiful too. she's the best part of the night sky
do you have to look at her alone?

she's.... something. no. i wouldn't mind the company.

good, then.

i wish i could share the sun with you. i would if i could.

when you're warm in my arms is... close. it's enough.

for now. maybe

i do love the moon, though. i've fallen asleep out there once or twice. in the maze.

have you read about artemis?

i've come across the name but haven't reached her yet. why?

she's the moon goddess
the elder people of this world used to worship her.
she's a hunter, and she's chaste, and she protects women

it thought you might like her.

i do. but it sounds like she might hate me.

only if you flirt with her

she needn't worry. I'm no Luminor.

apollo actually

he's her brother in this world
twins
no tragedy involved.

... we never did question if Luminor and Nocturna had a sibling kind of love for each other.

i have to admit i'm not really sure how much that would change anything

i don't know very much about love, but if it ends with someone dying then you're doing it wrong

sibling rivalry is a complicated thing, i hear. not that i had that, of course. i was a perfect only child (:

[ ... ]

were you close to the ones who changed you?
your parents

( .... )

one of them. my mother. sometimes i called her sister. she said mother made her feel old. she was fucking old. 750 at least.

you said you didn't remember being human

is she the one who taught you how to be a vampire? what was her name?

yes. to both questions. and also, she made me. her name was Larisa.

is it

do you dislike talking about her?
about any of them
i don't want to upset you.

no. no... i haven't talked about any of them in thirty years. i suppose i'm a bit rusty at it.

if you wouldn't mind, i would like to hear about them

and about you
what you were like back then, before everything.

meet me at the lake.

i will.

[ he in fact waits there, watching the sun set from the banks so that his skin will still be warm from it when lexi arrives. it seems that he likes that, so. ]

( Lexi eventually makes his appearance as the sun disappears over the horizon. he's dressed in loose flowing, pants, a long kimono, and bare feet. wrapped around himself is a large, soft blanket of a material he doesn't recognize.

he crouches down and sits next to Dani, looking out across the setting rays. ) This hour comes the closest to reminding me of home.

I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not...

[ dani sees what he means. the sky is still stained with sunset, the clouds flamed with red and orange. it does come closest. but it feels nicer, and the moon and stars will follow.

dani's dressed in jeans, a soft cotton t-shirt, and a larger, looser, open shirt with the sleeves rolled up a little. all his clothes are black. there's shoes beside him, but his feet are also bare, because he had them in the water until it chilled.

he looks up with a warm smile, and scoots up against lexi, reaching to take his hand. ]

This sky has more to look at. Hey, I like this.

[ he tugs lexi's kimono. ]

( as Dani moves closer, Lexi holds open his large blanket to invite him into it with him.

as usual these days, Dani is a warmth Lexi can never know.

he looks down at the kimono Dani tugs at and nods. ) I like it, too. I like the clothes of this world quite a bit, actually.

[ he settles in with him, tucking against him. Tilting his head up, he kisses his jaw. ]

Me too. Possibly because I suddenly have the nice ones, it's maybe not terrible pretending to be rich.

( Lexi nudges against his jaw at that. ) Do try to remember that the next time I invite you to the palace, yes?

[ there's a thing he's not ready to go back to. he aims for distraction with a real kiss, soft and on the lips. his thumb runs along lexi's jaw. ]

Tell me about the palace. It was home for...what. Two hundred years?

( Lexi allows the distraction. he's not aiming for a full conversation on the topic, anyway. just reminders when Dani gets close to the idea.

when the kiss breaks, Lexi nods. )

It's the only home I've ever known. We call it the palace, but it's the size of a small village. It holds all the great lineages and their houses.

[ one place, the size of a village. that's bigger than this house, which already feels enormous. dani settles in to listen, moving his arm to hook around lexi's knee. ]

Lots of enemies close by. [ but maybe that hadn't seemed the case, then. ] You liked it there?

Keep your enemies close. ( Lexi echoes. ) They didn't start out enemies. ( he sighs. ) The families were all so close once. One large family with different names...

( he nods his head. ) There wasn't much to dislike.

[ they'd been close, but they'd betrayed him. killed his family, intended to kill him. it makes something deep inside dani burn. he hasn't much love for vampires anyway, aside from this particular one. but the ones who'd turned on their own rulers deserved some special punishment. ]

Did you think of them as family, then? When you were young.

No. ( the word seems startled from him. ) I always called them family, but...

( he drops his head, looking at the ground. ) Something in me always knew the betrayal was coming. I tried to pretend it didn't. I never could find evidence, after all. But I felt it throughout all my life. The second I was made.

I was only ever close to other Dravens. I could trust them.

[ always suspicious, then. but he'd been right to be. ]

And your mother. Is she the one you were closest to?

( he nods again. )

Larisa. My father was Vasil, but it was Larisa who made me. Taught me about being a vampire. Taught me about being a royal. Prepared me for the day I would take the crown.

Larisa was my world.

[ dani never had a mother. or he did, obviously, but he never knew her. this sort of relationship is alien to him. but he hears the warmth in lexi's voice, understands that it meant something. that it was important, and it was taken away. ]

Were you the only vampire she ever made? You said, only child. No brothers or sisters?

( he shakes his head. ) No, she made plenty of others.

I was just the only lineaged vampire she made. So the others didn't hold the same titles or power we did.

There were other Dravens aside from the three of us. Larisa was queen, though. Which made me her heir. We were the center of the Draven family.

[ yeah, at some point we were bound to hit complex vampire things. dani vaguely understands how vampires are made. lineaged vampires are something else, though,he never met one before lexi. the bloodlines wouldn't have sullied themselves with the fields. he remembers the handlers' resentment about that very thing. but as a result, the practical difference has always been uncertain for him. he assumed that just being made by someone from the bloodline was enough. ]

Well, so...

What's different, how is a vampire like you made compared to the others? It's more than just the blood exchange?

( Lexi raises an eyebrow at Dani. ) You want me to just reveal my family secrets? ( he teases.

it is guarded knowledge, but he doesn't actually care to let Dani know. ) We have altars, carved with the aid of witches and left in the light of the red sky.

The maker must already be lineages. Then they drain everything, and the husk is left to bath in the light for twenty fours. After which, the vampire that drank from you now feeds you nearly all their blood.

Now you're lineaged.

[ it sounds like death. how could anyone come back from that...

well they wouldn't, would they, under normal circumstances. there's magic involved. ]

So that's what happened to you, they left you out...

[ no. he doesn't want to picture it. he looks away, then leans in a little against lexi. ]

It's alright, your secrets are safe. What was it like to wake up from...that? Had you already forgotten your human life?

( he holds Dani at that, then worries at his lip. )

Yes. But I don't think that's normal. Even for a lineages vampire. ( he confessed. )

Waking up for me was like being born.

[ dani looks up. ]

So that wasn't the same for your mother and father?

Why you, then. Maybe there's something different about you.

[ but what? lineaged vampires are already special. more powerful, revered, longer lifespans.

dani hesitates, then, bright eyes studying lexi's face. ]

The...power you used on me, once. Could your mother do that too?

( Lexi blinks in surprise, sitting upright a little more. he'd been going to get there himself in the end, but Dani got there quickly.

he shakes his head. ) I've never heard of another vampire who could. And no one in my lineage has expressed this power to my knowledge.

( he hesitates to say this next part. he'll sound insane. ) When I woke up.... I heard a voice in my head. "Tell no one."

I don't know if I was just coming off the high of change or if it was simply instinct. I've never heard such a thing again. But... I obeyed.

[ a voice.

the strange power had seemed obvious to dani, he's never seen a vampire use anything like that before. or felt it. if a handler could've done it, they'd use it all the time. until this moment he'd thought it was a bloodline thing, but... ]

Tell...no one what?

[ he frowns.

that is a power he's familiar with. ]

Some vampires can talk in your head. Maybe it was one of them, and they'd done something you can't recall.

It's not impossible. ( he does nod his agreement. ) The thought did occur to me later. But if it was one of them... why say it and never find me again?

( he shakes his head... then curls his fingers into his hands. ) No. This was something inside of me. An instinct or something.

It could have saved my family. If I'd shown this power. Used it.

But something in me stopped me.

[ dani frowns. ]

You don't know that. Especially if you'd been hiding it, not using it. You don't know what it might have done or how...many you could have controlled at once.

You might have fought and they would have killed you too. Lexi, their deaths were not your fault.

[ thirty years, it's been. he doesn't talk about them. he doesn't talk about that power, either, he probably wouldn't have even told dani if he hadn't used it on him.

which makes it all the more notable that he used it on him. ]

( he shakes his head. ) No. I don't know that.

But the power is a sign. It's a sign of the Draven strength. That's why they killed us. They thought our line was weakening. How could we rule if we were not better than the rest of the vampires?

My power would have shown them our line wasn't weak. It would have restored confidence. They would have accepted me as king. ( there's tension in his voice as he talks. )

[ dani shakes his head. ]

No. It would have been a threat to them. They saw an opportunity and they took it. Why bow to you when they could sit the throne themselves?

[ he reaches to take lexi's hand again. he can hear the tension, the upset in his voice. it's lacking his usual confidence and lustre, it's fearful and it's real. and it's full of grief. ]

You did what you had to do. You survived.

What was it that you said to me, about survivor's guilt?

( he covers Dani's hand and shakes his head. ) No. You don't understand us. Or the palace. My line has ruled for thousands of years because we were power. We were strength.

They wouldn't have moved on us if they knew Sanguis' blood was still strong on us. Larisa made me to be their last resort. ( he chokes slightly saying those words out loud. ) She made me to save them.

And I betrayed her. Something inside me told me to hide it, and I listened to that unknown over her.

She's dead because of me. ( he still can't look at Dani, but Dani will see red start to run down his cheeks. )

[ he understands vampires, dani thinks. not the lineaged ones, maybe, but they're all still vampires in the end. they all look for power and advantage, they all want to assert--

the thought dies long before it finds its way to its mouth. it just, gods, it just doesn't matter.

he shifts, and he puts his arms around lexi. he pulls in tight to him, and presses his forehead against his temple. after a moment, he tilts his head to kiss his cheek, to kiss some of those blood tears away. ]

Lexi. My love. [ he speaks softly, only wanting to soothe. ] I'm so sorry. I'm so, so very sorry.

( Dani's warmth is...

it's enveloping.

Lexi gasps as he melts into that warmth. as his fists bunch into his shirt. as his sobs break through him and the tears flow more than they ever have.

it's been thirty years and he's never cried over this. not once.

he just allows himself to get lost in Dani in the moonlight. )

[ dani gathers him. he pulls him close, draws lexi down into the crook of his shoulder. his hands are gentle, smoothing back his hair.

he doesn't try to stop him, doesn't try to calm him. he doesn't think that's what's needed. he thinks these are tears that need to flow. they come from pain, and some pain deserves to be felt. he lost his whole family, his home, his inheritance. and he's dealt with it alone, for decades, without anyone to lean on at all.

well, he can lean on dani.

he leans his cheek on lexi's head, and murmurs softly against his ear. ]

It's alright. I'm here, I have you. It's alright, I promise.

[ he's unaware of it, but as they sit there, his skin grows all the warmer, as though he's sitting still in the noonday sun. the light inside him doesn't rise, but its warmth does, and filters through him to the vampire in his arms. ]

( it's a long moment before Lexi regains his composure. he's breathing in deeply, trying to still himself with the air around him. it's so... warm. it's full of Dani.

Dani's warm, too. so warm...

finally, he levels out. the numb settles in over him in a shuddering gasp and he goes limp in Dani's arms. ) I'm sorry. I... I don't do that. I'm sorry.

[ dani just holds him through it, even after he goes still, and it seems the tears have stopped.

he strokes the tears away with warm fingers, but the bloodstains remain. he reaches for the edge of the blanket to help wipe them properly away, and then he just relaxes, his hands stroking lexi's arms. ]

Don't say that. You can do that with me.

[ he moves to kiss the top of his head, then brings up his hand to kiss that too. ]

It's alright. You're not alone anymore.

( Lexi can't look at Dani.

he can't... fathom the things he says. he's been alone for two hundred years. he loved Larisa and Vasil and the rest of his family. but he's always been... distant. careful. something in him always keeping him apart.

he doesn't know how to... do this.

but he doesn't pull away, in the end. ) When you're out here... do you ever feel like the moon is mocking you?

[ dani still leans with him, holding him and touching him. but his head tilts up, now.

the last vestiges of sunset have filtered away. the starts are beginning to appear, and the moon is gaining in her brightness. artemis, gazing down at him.

except that he doesn't really see artemis. he sees nocturna. and he knows that's wrong, because nocturna is not the moon of this world, but...

but still, it's her he sees. ]

Not exactly mocking. It makes me sad, though, and I don't really know why. I don't feel like that with the sun.

You feel she's mocking you?

Yes. ( he says softly, looking up at the moon now. ) I don't feel like the moon as any love for me.

[ dani looks down at him, then gently touches his chin. he holds his eyes, dark eyes still touched with red. ]

She's a fool, then. She must not be looking right.

( Lexi allows his gaze to be dragged to Dani. )

Why do you insist on caring for me? I'm the epitome of everything that's harmed you in our world.

[ he frowns.

it's a question he's asked himself so many times. he's not sure that he understands the answer, even now.

but he knows how he feels, so that's what he says. ]

I tried not to. But I can't help it, Lexi. I hate vampires. But you...

It's all different with you. You're all I think about. Maybe that makes me a fool, too, but if I am, then I'm your fool.

( that's... there's no logic to it.

maybe that's the point. he's heard people say it over the centuries. love doesn't always follow logic. )

I love you, you fool. ( Lexi murmurs as he leans in to kiss Dani. )

[ there is no logic.

there's no sense to that word, either. dani couldn't explain what love is if he tried. some of his books talk about it. he's heard people say it before, too, but it never seemed real to him. not even once.

until now.

he returns that kiss, pressing into it and sliding his fingers back into lexi's hair again. when their lips break, his eyes stay closed for a moment, then slowly open. ]

I love you, Lexi. That says it better.

( Lexi nods his head. ) I know you do, Dani.

[ he leans his head on lexi's again, smiles, and wraps the blanket a little tighter around them.

the stars are out now, and the moon is much brighter. ]

I'm going to take care of you.

[ he's looking at the moon when he says it, but he's still, very softly, talking to lexi. ]

( Lexi leans in against Dani in that blanket. he looks up to the sky with him and sits on that. )

You can't.

[ his hands are gentle, and still warm, but his arms are solid and keep lexi against him. ]

You think not. I will, though. I'm not asking permission.

( well... shit. he doesn't know how to counter that in his moment.

so he'll let Dani live with the delusion for now.

he looks out at the lake. ) She is pretty. ( he says of the moon and her reflection. )

[ Dani smiles. ]

She's beautiful.

I wish she could hear us. [ Nocturna. ] I wish she could see how much we missed her.

Would she forgive us? ( Lexi frowns. ) Maybe it's best she doesn't hear us.

[ a minor little shake of dani's head. ]

No. We don't deserve it. If our world was her vengeance, she deserves to have it, and we deserve our suffering.

Humans, vampires, wolves. All of us.

( Lexi sits on that a moment. then nods. ) Our world failed her.

We don't deserve the moon at home.

[ his head shakes again. he closes his eyes, and feeling tears behind them, he turns to press his cheek back against lexi's head. ]

I told you, looking at her makes me sad. I love her. But it always ends this way.

( Lexi is surprised by the reaction. he feels... anger and pain when he sees the moon. shame even.

he reaches up to brush Dani's cheek. ) Why sad?

[ he murmurs at that touch, and turns his head to kiss lexi's fingers. ]

I don't know. I just am, I...

[ a shake of his head. ]

I know it's just a story. The gods are dead if they were ever real. It's made me cry all my life, even so.

( he leans in to kiss the top of his head. ) It's just a story.

All we feel... it's probably just guilt the stories have pushed onto us. They're just objects in the sky. It's not real.

I know.

[ this emotion doesn't make sense.

but lexi says we feel. and he talks about feeling mocked, judged. that makes no sense, either. it's not just dani, it's both of them.

he opens his eyes, and looks at lexi again. that brings back his smile, enough that he leans in and kisses him again. ]

You're real. This is real. I don't know how I can be sad when you just told me you loved me, that's stupid. I'm sorry.

Now you're the one apologizing. ( Lexi laughs slightly and shakes his head. he leans in to kiss him again. )

It doesn't matter. We're here together. That's all that matters.

[ that part, he can agree with. he nods, and leans in to kiss lexi's smile. he thinks he could kiss him all night. ]

It is.

Thank you for talking to me even though it hurt. Thank you for trusting me.

Yes, so don't tell everyone I was crying. ( he teases.

but he does add more seriously. ) And the blood power I showed you. Tell no one, please. Should I need it, it's best no one expect it.

Lexi.

[ dani shifts so that he can look him in the eyes, and rests his hand against the side of his jaw. ]

All of your secrets are safe with me. I promise.

[ ... ]

It's a blood power?

[ he thought lexi was just moving him with his mind. that's far more involved than he realised. ]

( oh.

he thought that obvious but maybe not?

he blinks at Dani. ) Was that not obvious?

[ how was that possibly obvious.

a minor shake of his head, while the look he gives lexi does most of the work. ]

No, there was just this...tug, pulling me to my knees and holding me there. I thought you were just doing that with your mind.

What were you actually doing?

I was grabbing your blood. ( he tells him like it's the most normal thing. ) I can feel it. Even now. Not just in the way other vampires can. It's... in me somehow...

( he tilts his head, then lifts his hand. Dani's hand raises with it, and Lexi twists his fingers and Dani's fingers curl in on themselves. ) Feel it more closely. The pressure is coming from inside you. Not from an external force.

[ in his defence, the last time this power touched him, lexi had been attacking him. he'd panicked, he hadn't really been thinking about much.

but now, he sees what he means. there is something moving him, but it's less like anything is wrapping around him, and more like there's a string attached. ]

That's...gods.

[ frowning, he stares at him. ]

How much have you used this, do you...can you control it when it's outside the body, too?

( Lexi let's him loose, then brings his wrist to his own hand. he bites into his wrist and lets the blood start to flow.

but as he watches, the blood starts to raise off his skin. it pulls into the air and forms into a crystal hanging above his hand. ) I don't practice on others often. I have to kill anyone I practice on.

So, I'm more skilled at manipulating blood externally through practicing with my own blood.

[ feeling it had been strange enough.

this? this is unbelievable.

fascinated, dani leans closer. it's solidifying. it's doing...exactly what he wants it to. ]

And when it's solid, you can still feel it?

[ it's hovering, so obviously he can. ]

Lexi, you could...I mean, in theory? You could heal people. Stop them from bleeding out, get rid of injuries. Maybe even more.

Stop people from killing my family. ( he adds.

he flicks his wrist and turns the crystal into a sharp spike that he throws across the way into a tree. )

I know... It's... the possibilities are endless. I haven't even found them all.

[ okay. the crystal's also a weapon.

unexpected. but effective, clearly.

dani puts his hand on lexi's chest. ]

Look, you can't change what they did. But you can get your throne back, you can do that. You've time to learn all you can do.

I intend to. On both fronts. ( he nods his head. )

[ dani nods too. ]

That voice, from your first night. It never came back?

( he hesitates. )

Remember we talked about our dreams? You dreamt the sun? I dreamt the stars? ( this is so weird, but... ) There's also a girl there. In the field, watching the stars.

Her voice reminds me of that first time.

[ yes.

he dreamed the sun. ]

What does she say in the dreams?

( a pause. )

She says we're almost there.

[ there's a chill on the back of dani's neck, hair standing on end. ]

Almost where?

The chalice. She wants me to find the chalice. ( he glances at Dani. )

[ yeah.

fuck. ]

Lexi, you've seen how the sun looks here, right? On videos, and such.

( Lexi furrows his brow in confusion, but nods. ) I've seen it, yes. Through the videos and windows at the right angle.

[ dani nods. ]

It looked exactly the same in my dreams.

Exactly the same. And it felt the same. Like home.

[ he shakes his head. ]

How could I have known any of that without seeing it?

( Lexi's brow only furthers more at that. ) How did you dream it so realistically...?

I don't know, Lexi.

[ it's weird. how could he get it so right? ]

We don't have books in the fields, we don't have pictures or anything like that. I've never even seen an impression, so how?

There's something more to these dreams. I knew it the last time we talked about it, and I couldn't have told you why. I still can't. But they're more than dreams, I can feel it.

( Lexi doesn't want to give credence to that. but he knows there's truth in it. he's felt it too. he's just been ignoring it. )

Maybe... here we can have time to learn. Understand. Go home better prepared.

Maybe. I used to wonder if it came from Aggie. Magical shit, trying to give me hope. But she's not here, and I still have the dreams.

[ he sits back, thoughtful. ]

And there's no voice that speaks to me. It's all just feelings.

Can you question the woman? Find out what she wants?

( Lexi rolls his eyes. ) I've tried. She tells me to just stay my course, and I'll see in time.

I'd fight her on it, but I never can reach her when I want to. And I do need the Chalice.

I know.

[ but there's clearly more to all this. he chews his lip. ]

Maybe a witch could help us look into it.

Matt might like the challenge.

We could ask.

[ he watches lexi. ]

We don't have to tell him more than you want to.

( he's quiet a moment. )

He'll need to know enough to study appropriately.

I... think he can be trusted.

[ dani reaches to take his hand again. ]

If we're on this path for a reason I want to know who put us there.

It all seems so much bigger than us.

( he squeezes his hand. ) I don't care who put us here. In the end, I'm the one that's going to be in control of it all.

I won't let anyone else take that from me again.

[ dani nods.

lexi does, honestly, fit with his assessment of what a vampire is, and wants. logically, he isn't different. he wants power at any cost, he'll stand on the backs of others to get it. he's angry for good reason, he wants revenge. and he's outwardly said he won't do anything different in their world, won't change anything for dani's people. won't make any of the bad any better.

dani shouldn't support him.

and yet, because it's lexi, he does. better him than any of the others, because it's him. ]

I'll help you get there. I promise, we'll stop the ones who hurt your family. All of them.

( every time they get this close... )

And then you'll still choose to go off and die alone?

[ he hesitates, as he always does.

he wants to say yes.

more and more, that feels like a lie. ]

I don't want to leave you.

But you will? ( he asks. )

Lexi.

[ he doesn't know how to articulate what he wants.

his guilt at knowing so many others are suffering in the fields.
his fear that things will never change.
more guilt, at being complicit with that, benefiting because he knows the king while others are hurting.

a far more selfish fear, that things won't be the same in the palace. that everything they've found together here in these talks, in their moments of quiet and trust, will be lost because in the palace lexi would be a vampire and dani would be a pet, and they wouldn't be equal, and they couldn't have this anymore. he would be under lexi's complete control. he would be on his knees bound by his blood, he would be cuffed to the bed while lexi pushed him beyond his limits. he would be that dani, and lexi would be that lexi.

he doesn't know how to put it all into words.

nor does he know how to explain that in spite of all of it, there is a strong part of him that wants to say yes, just so that he doesn't have to leave. ]

I don't know. I...

[ he closes his eyes. ]

I want to say yes. You have no idea how much.

Then say it. ( Lexi pushes.

he shouldn't. he didn't mean to. but every time he thinks to the future... he can't help but associate Dani's death with it now. it's all he thinks about. it's consuming him. )

Say it for me. If nothing else, do it for me, Dani. I'm begging you.

[ the more he's pushed, the more he wants to fight it, even while there's a fight going on inside him, too.

he doesn't want to lose lexi. but he'll lose him either way, won't he? ]

I...

[ he shakes his head. ]

Tell me everything would be the same. Tell me we'd be the way we are here, today, that people would look at me and see a person and not a blood bag. Tell me that I'd be fighting the system that hurt my people and not part of it.

Tell me that and I'll say yes right now.

( his heart breaks into a thousand pieces in that request. )

I can't. They'll kill us. Or worse, they'll kill you and force me to be their king still.

[ yeah.

that's what he thought. dani's expression carries the weight of his sadness, full of pain and guilt. ]

I know.

We'd have to play a role. Mine would make me less than a person. You love this me, Lexi, would you even want the man I'd have to pretend to be?

You wouldn't have to change your behavior. You'd be mine. You could behave however you wished, no one could reproach you.

You just couldn't enact change. That's where it would end.

[ you'd be mine.

those words are so incredibly hard to turn from. he wants to be lexi's. the moments when he feels happy, and secure, and untouchable, are always moments in lexi's arms.

he looks at him, exhales. ]

My people would hate me. They'd be right to.

And even knowing that, I don't know that I could walk away from you. I think that would be harder than anything I've done til now.

Then don't. ( Lexi grips his shirt, not dangerously. a plea. )

You heard what I lost. Don't make me lose you.

[ fuck.

dani stares at him. he saw that pain. he saw what it cost him.

could he fucking live with that, costing lexi that same pain again?

whatever he does, the guilt will eat at him. no decision is free of that.
but one keeps him with lexi. one lets him have that.

he pulls closer again, wrapping a hand around lexi's and reaching to hold his cheek with the other. ]

Okay.

Alright. After, I'll stay with you, I'll be yours. I'll stay.

( Lexi pulls him in tightly. he kisses him. hard. needily. a desperate rush to shut Dani up before anything else he won't like comes out of that beautiful mouth.

he'll stay.

that's all he needs. for Dani to stay. to live. )

[ it's a crushing kiss, and it matches everything they'd just gone through together. it's painful. heated.

it hurts the same way love does.

dani's arms wrap around him, in equal parts yielding to him and pressing back against him. his fingers rake through lexi's hair. ]

I'm sorry. [ said in gasped breaks between kisses. ] You're the last person I would hurt. The last.

( Lexi falls back into the grass, the blanket splaying out underneath him.

he pulls Dani with him, kissing him desperately. he shakes his head as he mutters between those kisses. ) Then don't leave me. Never leave me.

( his hands scratch down Dani's sides, pushing at his pants to try to pull them off him. )

[ dani's shirt is already gone. he doesn't recall shrugging it off, but when he leans over lexi he's only in the tee. he pulls that off, too, tosses it aside.

then works on lexi's kimono. every kiss, every touch, is urgent, desperate.

dani's pants get themselves gone, finally, and entirely naked, he sits astride lexi's hips. ]

I won't. Not ever.

[ he bends to him, kissing him again. his hands slide over his chest, pushing up his clothes. dani's naked and there's still too many clothes between them. ]

( in fairness, Lexi dresses light for a reason. he likes the ease with which the kimono slides off over his arms, bunching beneath him the same way the blanket now does.

and his pants are loose. they take little effort to untie so they can be kicked down.

and then he's naked under Dani, cock already hard for Dani.

Lexi's hand is out at his side, and it curls into a fist. Dani will feel the tug inside of him as his blood moves him, bringing him down to Lexi to kiss again. the grip is loosed the second he has those kisses. a tease of his powers and just what else they might do... )

[ the air leaves him as he's pulled back down. he kisses him back, hard cock twitching against lexi's stomach at the urgency of it. his heart is racing. understanding hits him a second later, and he grins, watching lexi with a whole new interest. ]

I could get used to that.

[ when it's not hurting him, that power is...something. he nudges lexi's chin with his nose. ]

You want to play with me? [ he's unafraid. he trusts lexi. ] What else can you do?

( Lexi grins wickedly back at him.

he runs a fang over Dani's lip and sighs. ) I don't know. I've never tried like this...

( he shakes his head. ) Later. When I'm more level.

Right now I just need- ( the hand at his side flicks it's fingers, pulling Dani's hips forward. interesting. ) You. In me. And I don't have the patience for it.

[ fuck, the sight of that fang--

dani really needs to fucking examine himself. and to be fair, there is absolutely no part of him that wants to do this now. there has been so much thinking, and feeling, and guilt, and weight.

the physical side has always been easy for them. no more thinking. lexi's right.

also, his impatience is noted. dani lifts his brows. ]

I've no lube, so you'd best know what you're asking.

[ but he does shift between lexi's legs, pushing his knees apart. he licks his fingers, then moves them between their bodies, dragging them back past lexi's taint. he pushes in against his hole, working the tight muscles until he can push his way between them. ]

( Lexi's legs part under Dani's easily. he raises them up over Dani's waist and wraps them around his waist to keep Dani from getting too far from him again.

Dani's fingers are in him suddenly and he groans. whines even. he's tight. he's always tight. and Dani's are thick in his ass. he arches his hips, using Dani's back to leverage himself to do so. his cock twitches against his stomach as he does and he shudders. )

I know what I said. ( Lexi grins at him with dark, dangerous eyes. )

[ dani loves that look.

grinning back, he wraps his free hand around lexi's shaft and strokes it, wanting to help him into this. he needs him to fucking relax, and he's tense in every sense of the word.

his fingers slide deeper. he turns them, hooks them. spits more lubrication down to his hand, moves his fingers apart, stretches lexi deeper. he's gonna start keeping the lube in his pocket, they rarely keep their hands to themselves now that they're here. now that they really do have as much time together as they'd like. gentle, he pulls his fingers back, and teases lexi's hole with a third. ]

( Lexi's hips jerk at the touch on his cock. he leaks pre at his tip that drips into Dani's strokes and make his length slicker under Dani's touch.

his throat makes a kreening sound as Dani works to stretch. he does need to relax.

he takes breathes, swallows the warm night air. forces his body to relent to Dani's pressure. then he feels that other finger. )

Hng- yes. More. ( Lexi begs. )

[ he wants to give it to him. he doesn't want to hurt him, but...

on the other hand, it's lexi. he might like it.

shifting, dani slides his fingers through lexi's pre and pulls it down over his own cock, helping to make it slick. that single act makes him so fucking hard that he almost can't bear it, and he moans, rolling his hips forward into his own hand.

and as a result, he does not obey that request for more. instead he pulls all three fingers back, leaving lexi's hole momentarily empty. then, the wet tip of his cock pushes against that abused rim, and dani whines at the tension. ]

Fuck, you're so-- tight, shit!

[ he eases the head past lexi's rim, then fucks slowly forward, burying himself inch at a time. it's torture, perfect sweet torture. his head drops forward, hair falling into his eyes. his hands take a rough grip of the blanket beneath them. ]

Nghhh...Lexi.

( maybe.

definitely.

same fucking thing.

Lexi laughs slightly as Dani suddenly pulls back to prepare his cock. clearly not the only one who's impatient.

then he feels the head of that cock against his hole. he can feel Dani already dripping against his hole. then finally. into him.

his thighs tense and nails dig into Dani's shoulders at that sudden intrusion. it's so slow. which is partially his own fault. he is tight. and he's trying to relax. but then Dani shoves another inch into him and he's moaning into the night.)

Fuck- yes, Dani!

[ he's so tight. he's willing but his body's resisting, physically. the sensation drives dani crazy, lexi's cheeks squeezing his cock so hard. his hips move so slowly at first, rolling his hips forward more than thrusting. with each slight movement, more of him slides inside, until he has enough purchase to move faster.

he pushes up on his knees and rocks himself forward, gasping as another few inches slide inside. ]

Fuck. Lexi, spread your fucking-

[ he shoves lexi's knees wider apart, giving himself space, and he fucks into him with strength. not holding back, he braces himself on lexi's knees and pushes himself in, until at last, he bottoms out in that tight little ass. there's heat all around him, his curls are sticking to his forehead. but he moves faster now, as his own pre slickens up the tunnel he's driving in. each thrust ends with a soft slap as his hips connect with lexi's ass. finally his nails drag their way down the vampire's thighs, scraping at his skin while dani's body curves over him and makes him take every inch of his cock. ]

Do you sparkle?

( this username looks vaguely familiar..... )

are you Alina's friend? and no? why would i sparkle?

Yes. Because you're a vampire. [She only reads the network when Alina or Paul are having conversations, obvi.]

vampires don't sparkle.

Yes they do.

where are you getting this information?

A very reputable source. If you don't sparkle, prove it.

( what even....

attached is a picture of him with the most confused look in a kimono open over his bare chest. )

see? no sparkling.

You're inside, that doesn't count. Vampires sparkle in the sun. Nice kimono.

is that what these are called? i do like them. thank you. but also, i can't go in the sun. i'll die.

That sounds like a very convenient reason why you can't go in the sun. Almost as if you had something sparkly to hide. Yes, they're very comfortable. [A photo of her in a silky white kimono, open over her equally bare chest. Tits 4 tits.]

( gods those are gorgeous tits.

no one ever taught Lexi not to stick his dick in crazy. )

they suit you better than me. you'll have to find another vampire to volunteer to let you see.

A flatterer. Perhaps you truly are a vampire, then. No, I think I like you. Even if you won't sparkle for me.

teeth and all. sorry, to disappoint you. i've heard you have some lofty ideas about vampires and werewolves.

Show me. Have you? My ideas are influenced by literature, not all of it lofty. Quite the opposite, in fact.

( he sends her a close up of his mouth, his lip pulled back into a sneer to show his fangs where human canines would be. two on top, with the inner one smaller than the outer. and one on bottom. )

so you haven't met a vampire that sparkles here?

Oh, how lovely. [Perhaps she means it genuinely -- Alia is that sort of girl. She'll even send a photo back, her own bright teeth bared in a laugh.]

Tragically, no. I'm feeling very put out by that fact.

How would you know if blood is poisoned?
Would you be able to taste it?

( ......... weird fucking question. )

yes. blood has different tastes under the most normal of circumstances. poison would be obvious.

Would you test mine?

[ Very normal things to ask!! She's been wondering since they talked. Has her world actually seeped its poison underneath her skin? One way to find out. ]

( ..... not where he thought this was going. )

all right. if you really want me. i'll have to drink your blood to be certain. you can give me your blood however you choose, but biting you would give me the best chance for the purest taste and to ensure I get the enough to be positive in case it's not immediately obvious.

[ She wonders if it might make him sick, but she decides he's in charge of his own health and well being. ]

Bite me where?

( he wonders, too, but he should be able to recover from most anything....

it'll be a fun game. )

your wrist would be enough.

My wrist then.
Where should I meet you?

where would you be most comfortable?

[ Her room, but she's not sure how to mitigate the over protective dog man that shares her bathroom. Might not like this plan. ]

Doesn't matter.
I've almost certainly bled somewhere less comfortable.

fair enough. my room then. ( and he sends her his best guidance for his room. )

[ Well, what's a little bloodshed between recent acquaintances. There's no reason delay. Still, there's apprehension that sits in her gut. It's against her nature to offer up such a vulnerable part of herself. Does she really want to know? What difference does it make if the wastes have seeped into her blood. It's not as if she can clean it from herself now.

Still, she goes. She decides she wants to know, if for no reason other than to know. She raps on the door with her fleshy hand, her metal arm hanging at her side. ]

I've been told it's polite to knock.

[ Also, you really never know what you're going to run into behind a closed door in this place. ]

What do you do if you're trapped inside all day?
Aside from preening and gawking at yourself in the mirror.

that does take up the largest portion of the daylight.... but i spend a lot of time in the library. i genuinely like to learn about new things, like i asked on the network. the library is the most straightforward, but i do try to visit the other rooms in the house to see what else is on offer from time to time.

I'm surprised you look away from your reflection long enough for that.
Koby hasn't exiled you from the library yet?

you're very stuck on how nicely i make myself look. enjoying the results? and how would he ever enforce that? he's tiny. and frail.

I'm not all that impressed, truthfully.

( she said, like a liar. )

Appearances aren't everything.
Besides, it doesn't take that much strength to open a window in the library. That would do the trick.

that's a lie. ( it's not that he knows this; his ego is just that big. )

there's plenty of spaces in a corner where the light from windows doesn't reach. :) that's usually where i like to set up. and appearances are a good portion of it.

You don't have to be defensive. I'm sure you're impressive to someone.

( choke on that ego. )

Oh, so you perch. Like a gargoyle.

i know i am :) i rest like a gargoyle. far nicer.

Note "to someone".
I'm not that someone.

What riveting material is the gargoyle reading today?

so you insist. about artemis and apollo. dani mentioned them to me. i think someone else must have directed him to them. have you heard of them? twin gods of the moon and sun?

( twin gods. moon and sun, dark and light — dualities that can't exist without one another, despite how destined they are to snuff the other out, in order to take to their rightful throne in the sky. alina's stomach lurches, kneejerk, with the same unpleasant surprise that comes with missing a step on a staircase. some foreboding sense that, already, she won't like where this story is going. )

It might have been somewhere in the pile I ( stole ) loaned to him, but I hadn't gotten to it myself.
I can't say it sounds familiar. My country doesn't worship gods the way others do.

mine doesn't either. we may have, but our gods are believed to be all did if they ever did exist. no one worships the dead. how does your country worship? ... what is your country called?

Ravka. Our people worship saints, though I can't say I've cared to put much stock in them.

They're all dead, too, if you were wondering. It's an unfortunate requirement for saints. They don't get to be worshiped until they've given their life for the same people who wished them dead in the first place.

Edited 2024-08-28 21:23 (UTC)

that's macabre. why would you want someone dead who could do good for your world? shouldn't you want them to live longer?

Because the saints weren't saints when they were alive, Alexei. They were Grisha. What your world would call witches.
They loathed them for not suffering as the common folk did. They resented what they had.
People might hunger for miracles, but they'll always fear the power that makes them possible.

( he should be more surprised, but he knows what human pride can do to humans. he didn't see it in his own time, but he was taught it well. )

when our sun and moon vanished from our skies, humans fell into chaos. everyone was out to protect themselves. thousands died in those first decades. i know of the capacity for people to put their own fear and greed before the good of others. it sounds as if your Grisha could do wonders for your world. for the people. and the people bite the hands that feed them.

It's not that simple.

There are Grisha who have let themselves be ruled by their own fear and greed. Whose ambitions they put before the safety of their own kind. Whose mistakes have cast a shadow over our country for centuries.

So have our kings. So have our people. So have Shu Han and Fjerda.
There will always be men who choose power over the good of the people, whether they're born Grisha or not.

Edited 2024-08-28 22:31 (UTC)

you're right. i don't disagree with that sentiment. such as my own usurpers. they'll say they've done it for the good of our people. but will they really have? do you have no hope for your people?

I do. Ravka isn't beyond saving.

( for all that their country is a shambling corpse on its last legs, the answer is immediate, certain. whether she's the one capable of restoring it, brimming with new life, is another question entirely. )

I have to believe that there's a better future for all of us.
One where Grisha aren't prisoners chained to the whims of a hateful king.
Where Ravkan children aren't forced to put a rifle in their hands and march to their deaths.

is that what happened to you? pressed into an army as a child?

( annoyingly perceptive. that's traditional of a prince, she supposes — never mind a prince aware of the machinations of his court, readying himself for the pecking of the vultures that had swiped his crown. alina still falters into a pause, discomforted by his easy observation. )

We're all drafted when we come of age. Even royal children are expected to serve.
I was a mapmaker, before I was anything else. Assistant cartographer, Royal Corps of Surveyors.

you must be a talented artist. i am still sorry to hear you have a government that doesn't take proper care of it's people. you talked of a prince before. Nikolai, i believe? do you stand with him?

I was handier with a pencil than a rifle. I'm not sure you could call it a skill, so much as a necessity.

( self-deprecation alina starkov hours, as usual. )

Considering I helped him take the crown, I would say so.
Are you going to call me a usurper?

would you draw me something some time? i'd like to see myself. it's what you are. i won't deny that dethroning kings can be necessary. it just wasn't necessary in my instance. ( is that bias? it can be hard to tell. but either way, he'll die believing it. )

And you're a prick, but you don't see me throwing around names, do you?

( but more's the point: )

I know why Nikolai wanted the crown.
Why do you want yours returned?

i wasn't trying to insult you. just stating semantics. the people who took my crown are dangerous. they'll start slowly. vampires have years. but they'll start restricting humans even more than they already are. same with witches. wolves. everyone. they don't want to lead. they want to be worshipped. i've already witnessed. a whole town subsumed into a field of human chattel. and ultimately, i want my revenge.

That's not a good enough reason.
And it won't be good enough for the people suffering under their rule right now, either. I should know.

You shouldn't be fighting for a crown because they'll do worse.
You should be fighting for it because you'll do better.

i will do better. i'll maintain what's been keeping Tenebrax functioning for over two millenia. it won't be perfect, but it'll be better than what the others plan. they'll see the end of Tenebrax with their greed. i don't want that. i want what's best for the people.

And you're happy with that?
Passively maintaining your throne. Accomplishing nothing that will be remembered.

( no one's ever asked him that. he's heard the pleas from Dani to do better, but he's insisted the system is the best. and believes that.

but is he happy with it?

fuck... )

it's not about my happiness. it's about what's best for the most people.

Not if what's best for most people leaves the others to rot.
Or do you believe Nikolai should let the fear of the people dictate all Grisha lives?

No, it isn't about your happiness. It's not the job of queens and kings to be happy.
But maybe you should start considering what you can and can't stand to live with.

Before you wake one day to find you're just like every other king who came before you, too cowardly to take a stand on the things that mattered to him.

i appreciate your sentiment, Alina, i really do. but i don't have the luxury of chasing idealism. our world is dying. we have no sun. we have no moon. and someday, we'll have no world left. i don't enjoy the system, i will grant that. but it's what has kept the most people possible alive for the longest time possible. it's not about witches or werewolves or vampires or humans and who is and isn't holding the power. it's about keeping everyone alive as long as possible. this is my stand. if i have to be this, then i will be it for them.

It doesn't sound like you appreciate it.
It sounds like you're talking to a child.

You call it life. It doesn't feel that way to me. It feels like you're giving them an existence that isn't worth living. Restricted and miserable, just like Grisha.

Stop making yourself out to be a martyr, Alexei.
You're just another prince who failed the people who needed him to give them a voice.

no, it sounds like a man who wishes he could hold the same sentiments and can't. what would you have me do? return the sun to the sky? bring back the lakes and the rivers? restore long deceased crops? it is existence. and the other option is death. we are not at war with people, we are war with our planet. it is restricted because it has to be. there are not enough supplies to go around and there is no way for us to make more. we cannot import from other lands. there are no other lands. there is only us and what we have. not everyone gets what they want but at least everyone in my country has a proper shelter, food, and drink to wake the next day.

( it sucks the helium out of her anger, gradually deflating like a collapsing balloon. there is no sun summoner to light the skies, in his world. no tidemakers to stir the shores. no materialki to fertilize the ground, force seeds to crack open and take root. there's only the dying heartbeat of nature, a darkness more encompassing than the fold.

still, she hates the taste of defeat in the back of her throat. how useless it feels, to bleat out: )

It's not right.
Your world has magic. There has to be someone who could do something. Anything.

( .... he understands her response. he feels it deep in himself. something he's never wanted to voice out loud. because it's easier to beat himself into submission if he doesn't waste energy on things he knows won't work... )

i wish. maybe there will be one day. i wouldn't be opposed to change if we had an answer. but i've been alive 200 years myself and not witnessed anything that gives me hope for change. i really do want to just give everyone the best possible chance of survival.

Not even this place gives you hope?
You could take what you need with you, if we ever find our way out.

i fear the concept of hope at this point, if i'm being honest. but admittedly, i am curious. it's why i'm reading about artemis and apollo. and anything else related to the sun and moon. and why i nearly live in the library :)

Be grateful you still have your hope. Losing it should be what frightens you.

Part of you must believe your gods were once real, then.
How did they die?

i'm not sure what i believe. sometimes i do. sometimes not. it's also just easier to assign humanistic qualities to natural disasters. the story goes that the sun loved the moon deeply. but she did not return his love. he chased her every day and every night she fled from him. with time, the moon drove the sun to madness for want of her with no way to keep her. he chased and he chased and he chased until he was too fast even for her. then he caught her. begged her. pleaded with her. promised her all in his domain if she would just be with him always. she did not love him. she would not stay with him. and so he killed her in his anger. her blood bathed the earth in red. he collected it into a well that he hid deep beneath the earth so her light that would never shine again would be preserved in the peace of the dark. then he killed himself in his shame.

That's a horrible story.

( and too blighted with familiarity. forces destined to destroy one another. the obsessive prison of a powerful man's love. setting fire to the object of your desire, rather than allowing her to squirm out from beneath your thumb. no different than aleksander, who would make her the maiden in a minotaur's labyrinth, and call it a gift. a kindness.

nausea sloshes in alina's stomach, churning like seasick-waves. )

He never gave her a real choice.
But I suppose a cage looks like love to powerful men.

What happened to their worshippers? They all died out?

Edited 2024-08-29 17:52 (UTC)

it is a very tragic story. it's not quite clear what worship was like and what happened to it immediately after the loss of our sun and moon. but there were people who believed in it enough. humans desperate for whatever power the blood of a goddess would bestow upon them. humans learned of the well where her blood spilled. so they studied and traveled and scavenged the location of the beautiful nocturnal fountain. then they tainted it with their dirtied hands and their venomous greed. so Nocturna gave them what they desired. power. hunger. blood. and that's how vampires came to be in our world.

And that's why your kind can't stand sunlight, isn't it?
You're cursed to be weak to the same monster that killed her.
It's poetic revenge. I might've done the same, if I found no peace even in death.

( if she wasn't convinced such greed led to the collapse of his world, a ripple of consequences like a stone dropped in a lake ... well. )

Is it rude to ask how you were made?

Edited 2024-08-29 22:07 (UTC)

i can't say i fault her if the gods really were real. ( in fact, vampires usually tell the story that their wishes were granted. they were gifted power. Lexi can't shake the feeling of desecration that led to the creation of his kind. )

i don't mind the question. to make a vampire, you drain them of all blood then feed them your own until nearly dead yourself. then the new vampire needs to feed within the first six hours of creation. essentially to jumpstart their new body with the proper nutrition to sustain it but there's another way to do so, as well. i mentioned to you my house and bloodline, yes? normal vampires don't concern themselves with those distinctions as much. i'm a lineaged vampire. my sireline can be traced back to one of those original humans. all other houses in the palace are the same. they trace their lines directly to those first humans. but it's not just through creation, it's through a particular ritualistic creation that passes on the strength, sometimes even memories, of their lineage. it has to be done by an already lineages vampire. and it involves draining, then leaving the body on an altar beneath a clear red sky with no barrier between both for a full day cycle. then continuing as normal.

Oh. ( hm. ) That's gruesome.

( why you? she thinks, but doesn't type. that feels like a more intrusive question, on par with wriggling through a personal diary, between two relative strangers. acquaintances, on a good day. )

I don't understand. You would think they would want to hoard their power, rather than share it.
Why create children who might threaten your rule?

we're not gods. we can die. old age does claim some of us, but while rare accidents can happen. and there's never discounting outright murder.

( ?????????????????????? )

That doesn't sound like a very good trade deal.

which part?

All of it. But the murder part, particularly.
You make it sound like you're all out to kill each other.
I don't know about you, but I like my head where it is.

we're not all contemplating murder all the time. ( kind of funny thought, though. ) but it's irresponsible as leaders of a kingdom not to be prepared for the worst.

But it must be tiring, all of that constant scheming.
Your house spent decades waiting for an assassination attempt, from the sound of it.

[ He’s gone through every public comment on Lexi’s network post. Twice. It’s jarring, as a normal person from a normal world, to have two new arrivals announce their presence as vampires, which is bizarre, impossible, all the other words that seem to hold less and less meaning the longer he stays here. Fear is still potent, though. To have people among them that have cheated death, and pray upon the living to do so, it isn’t just disturbing, it’s an affront to all that is holy, it’s a wrench in his belief that this place is a purgatory, it’s a danger to everyone.

And yet. Lexi comes across, at least over text, as perfectly normal. Charming, even. It’s confusing. He’s confused. ]

Hi. My name is Tim Laughlin.

You don’t know me. But I think I have a friend who’s like you. A vampire. I was wondering if you could help me.

( interesting reach out...

he's always game for these kinds of conversations, though. )

a pleasure, tim. i'm assuming you must know of me from the network if you're reaching out, but not to wholly assume - my name is alexei. though i quite prefer lexi. i'm happy to try my best. i can't guarantee anything, as i've discovered there's some pretty interesting differences in not just vampire capabilities in different worlds, but also cultures. but there's also some common ground, so hopefully enough i'll be of some use.

Thank you, Lexi.

This person who I think is a vampire comes from a place similar to mine, or this one. Where humans are the vast majority. So I know that it might not be the same completely.

You wrote to Alicent that "some vampires will see mortals as a food source and not people." I assumed that would be the norm, if you need our blood to live. Is it not? The way you phrase it sounds like you want to distance yourself from those who "lack decorum."

( ah yes. the assumption of many. )

do you have vegetarians in your world? humans who choose not to eat meat? in my world there aren't many, but there are some amongst humans. ( he likes to think beggars can't be choosers, but still. sometimes they try to be. ) one reason i've heard that always struck me is the love for animals a person might have and the inability to stomach the idea of ending an animal's life for their own sustenance. unfortunately, vampires in my world can only drink the blood of humans for sustenance - animals have been attempted but we always end up starving. but just because it's what we have to survive on doesn't mean we have to view humans as less than because of it.

[ A conservative upbringing in the 1940s, so, ]

Not really. Some people, sure, but it isn't common.

You don't have to few us as lesser, but you have to eat us to live - what does that mean? Do you have a way to do it ethically, without hurting anyone?

I don't know if this is rude. That isn't my intention. I just want to know that my friends are safe.

i don't mind the curiosity. the least painless way is to use a needle to draw the blood from a human. unfortunately, i don't know of anyone that knows a way to get blood without that at least mild discomfort. of course, there are often people willing to volunteer to be bitten. either out of kindness or out of desire for the experience. i, personally, do prefer from humans that consent to let me drink directly. but i'll settle for stored blood poured in a glass. currently, the house provides me with sufficient blood that i don't need to seek volunteers.

You said elsewhere that it feels good. So they volunteer, for the eroticism? Is it difficult to control yourself, and not take more than you need?

Do you know where they're sourcing it? If they're killing someone for you, it's not any better than you attacking someone.

it can feel good for them. especially for those that enjoy pain and find pleasure in it, but even for those that don't there's an intimacy to it they crave. for myself, i do enjoy the intimacy and the eroticism that can bring out. it's not difficult for me to control myself, but i've had two centuries of practice. in the spirit of honesty, i did kill my first human ever from lack of control. none since. and in further honesty, i had assumed the house was getting it through blood donation on my arrival, similar to my own home. that's an assumption i never came back to until this conversation. i will be asking.

Intimate in what way?

[ ...a lot to think about, there. He almost makes it sound appealing, if not for the blood, and the mess, and the risk of death. It’s a bit more extreme than spanking and hair pulling. ]

This friend would have to be fifty years old at the very least. Likely older. Would that be enough time to have it under control in your experience?

That's not a safe assumption. At the welcoming party when I arrived, they tricked us into eating people. They made it look like cake, and when we bit into it, it was flesh and blood. We found the bodies out with the trash, with neat little slices taken out.

someone is sharing their life essence with you. you're up close and personal with them. it's very, very intimate. it should. but again, i'm only speaking for my world really. and so far the only one i've met from my world is a human. but yes, in my experience fifty or so odd years lends to good control.

( he answers each paragraph individually before reading the next one. so finally gets to the last one and- )

fucking shit. are you being serious? they tricked you into eating human bodies?

Can you be close enough to humans to have that kind of bond? I mean, if it were me, I wouldn’t want that kind of intimacy with a stranger.

Yes. We were under some kind of spell. This was early June, if you want to corroborate.

some people enjoy intimacy with strangers. i don't mind, as long as the other person is consenting and interested in it. i believe you. why has no one warned against this?

Other kinds of intimacy, maybe. But the blood from my veins? It's a big ask.

[ He doesn't necessarily enjoy that kind of intimacy with strangers, either. It's the Catholic guilt. But it's understandable, at least, not like giving up things that belong inside the body. ]

I can't speak for anyone else. But there's new horrors to occupy us every so often, they're probably worried about the next one. Watch out for the parties.

you don't have to offer that intimacy to anyone if you don't like it. intimacy is different for everyone. blood may be a new kind of intimacy, but it's like any other. it is for some and it's not for some. thank you for the warning. and i will be investigating where the blood that's feeding vampires comes from, now.

oh, no, I didn’t think you were trying to talk me into it. It's just a little tough to wrap my head around. I’d have to really love someone, I think, to want them to drink right out of my body.

You’re welcome. And I’m sorry for the interrogation. This is all still new to me. And disturbing. But I appreciate your openness.

I could help you look into it, if you want.

I've decided that when you're king, you should invent electricity. And movies, we should have movies.

You do recall we have problems with limited resources, yes?

The movies have interesting ideas about vampires. We might take some inspiration.

.... what does that even mean?

Not even one time have I seen you control mist or turn into a bat.

Because I can't.

And I suppose sparkling is completely out of the question.

What the fuck are you people watching that you think I can sparkle? You know I can't go in the sun!

There's quite a collection. I think I have a new hobby.

Stop watching the vampire ones.

But he has the skin of a killer, Bella.

I fucking hate this place.

Will you put me on your back and run really fast up a mountain?

I don't understand these references and I refuse to.

We should watch them together. You might get some ideas.

I'm not watching the vampire ones.

Are you afraid they'll be offensive?

I know they're going to be idiotic.

They have their moments.

No.

These people are really creative.

Then Im sure you'll enjoy it alone.

Who says I'll go alone? Lots of people like the vampire ones.

Then without me is what I should have said.

You know, you're sorely mistaken.

About what?

That not going with me will stop the teasing.

I'll just lock my bedroom door and ignore your calls.

You realise we share a bathroom.

I can lock the door to the bedroom from there too, you know.

Not while you're lounging in the bath.

I'll push the vanity in front of your door so you can't come in.

I can lay by it on my side and talk under the door.

They have things hear called headphones that play music directly in your ears so you can't hear anything else.

Songs have to end sometime. I can be patient.

I can string endless songs until i leave the bath.

But in the little spaces in between, you will hear me on the other side talking about spider monkeys.

And you will wonder what that has to do with vampires.

And then I will win.

I'm genuinely ignoring you now.

Okay.

I think you're prettier than the sparkling boy.

I haven't disappointed you with my inability to sparkle, then?

No that's stupid, that's why it's funny.

It's offensive.

It's hilarious, I laughed at loud.

You're not meant to do that in a movie apparently.

I don't see why it would be if the joke calls for it.

It's supposed to be serious romance or something, I don't know.

But it definitely called for it.

what do we do

Keep our heads down and don't draw attention to ourselves as potential targets. I'll be staying particularly quiet.

we should stay together

two look like vampire murders.

I hate to put you at risk, but I think I'm going to need the alibi.

you were with me, that's not a question

We may need to formulate evidence of that. People know how close we are. They might suspect you of lying for me.

well how are we to formulate evidence, we already live together

it's not lying to say we came back to the same room

Another witness maybe? I don't know what would be enough for the others.

finding the actual killer might do it.

There's more than one killer.

i know

i mean the vampire, so that they won't blame you.

If it was only one vampire. One is obvious, yes. But the others could still be vampires. Just sloppier ones.

two, possibly

but i don't know that they'd trace it to you. if i didn't know better i'd say it sounded like grace ran afoul of a werewolf.

i mean, a real one. like raisa.

Edited 2024-10-05 21:31 (UTC)

I had the same thought when I saw her. I don't know if there are any werewolves here, but it seemed animalistic.

exactly. i've never seen a vampire kill like that, it's wasteful. i'll tell them so if they come at you for that.

Be careful of defending me so hard it puts a target on your own back.

well i don't matter, you're the one who has to survive this place

Literal weapon against the vampires, Dani. You're needed more than me.

i didn't say i wasn't handy

look i'll be careful. this is all just ridiculous, and i really just want to be dealing with it with you. i was just starting to trust some of the rest of these people.

I spoke with Louis. There are rooms closer to his we can move into, even if just temporarily. I think it would be wise we stay close to him and his.

[ closer to louis would be good.

less sure about being closer to armand. ]

and do you trust all of his?

I trust Louis. I don't know the others well enough, unfortunately. But one of them is in a deep sleep, Louis says. He's defenseless. And I won't leave Louis to that alone.

armand's fledgling.

i don't like the way he talks.

[ it's not...

serious. not really. armand has only ever been polite, reasonable. but he plays with words. he's sly about what he says, and not directly honest.

and he'd called it the hunt, this game he plays with humans, and biting.

it made dani uncomfortable. that's all it is. and that doesn't really matter, it's not a real threat. he probably wouldn't think anything of it at all if he hadn't grown up the way he did.

no. it doesn't really matter. ]

but i trust louis
and i trust you.
do you want to move now?

He talks strangely. I don't disagree. It's why I have to trust Louis on this one. But if it weren't for Louis, I don't think I'd risk it at this stage. He hasn't said anything inappropriate to you, has he? ( he does try to stalk Dani, but he can't be everywhere. )

it's more about what he doesn't say. i don't like that he wanted volunteers for biting, for louis' birthday, but didn't say so. he said he'd tell them when it was right for them to know, but i think that time is when they're volunteering.

he said that's not elegant.
then something about how it's all part of the hunt.

[ even speaking it aloud again makes his fingers twitch. ]

louis wouldn't hurt anyone. wouldn't touch them unless they were alright with it. i know that. so it doesn't matter really.

i just don't like that he said it. or how he went about it.

( hmm. he does see why that would make Dani uncomfortable. ) Some vampires really do enjoy a game when it comes to it. It's not my style, but I am sorry you witnessed it.

and there was that feast.

[ the one dani had absconded from before he'd witnessed how bad it actually got. he doesn't even know the extent of what happened that night. ]

he was at the centre of it

i don't know. i'm being stupid, most likely. letting my past influence what i think of him. which isn't fair to him.

louis trusts him. i should trust him.

It's okay to not be comfortable with everything about vampires.

i know.

but i do trust louis. i like him. being closer to him would be good.

perhaps i need more human friends.

It couldn't hurt. Louis has said it's best we not approach their rooms, though. Armand is protective right now. Which I understand. No need to test his limits.

[ then he definitely doesn't want to go. ]

but he agrees we should be nearby?

Edited 2024-10-05 22:46 (UTC)

Temporarily. So that we might better defend each other.

alright.
we can go when you're ready.

Soon. We don't need to move all our things, either.

we should take them, in case you want to make it permanent

I'm not certain Armand is fond of me and would like me close long-term.

as you say, then.

perhaps he doesn't think you're elegant.

I've been sleeping on dirt and in pubs for thirty years. My graces have slipped.

i like the dirt.

honesty is your best quality.

Is it? I've not heard that before.

remember those early days, when we argued all the time. you promised you wouldn't bite unless i asked you.

you kept that promise. and all the others. you twist the truth sometimes, but you're no liar.

it's the first thing i liked about you.

well.

second.

my dick was the first, wasn't it?

close.

your chest. it's impressive, ask anyone.

ah, fair. i have heard i have nice tits.

you do. i liked getting my hands on them.

obviously i couldn't tell you so at the time.

[ when he sees lexi leave, dani's quick to follow. alina's words are still playing in his head.

he goes straight to his room with lexi, and shuts the door after him. ]

Lexi. Talk to me.

He gave her name. ( Lexi runs his hands through his hair, pacing. ) Why would he do that?

( he looks to Dani, red blood staining the edges of his eyes. ) He never said to me he didn't do it.

The girl you trust.

[ dani comes over to him, takes hold of his wrist and then reaches to touch his face.

he's crying. ]

I asked Alina, I thought she meant that Louis knew she was innocent. But she meant you know she's innocent.

What did Louis know about her?

I don't know.

I never asked what he knew. I just assumed he knew because most of us know each other. ( he shudders trying to fight it all down. )

When we talked, he didn't say he didn't do the kills. I came to check our conversation. He said it wasn't any of his. He didn't say it wasn't him or his. Just any of his.

( he's close to hyperventilating. a body memory. ) I want to trust him. I want to trust Alina. I can't do this.. ( the blood tears start to fall in rivulets. ) They should have killed me when they took the Palace.

Lexi.

[ dani's never seen him like this, breaking down like this. he's only ever seen him cry one other time, and that was about his mother.

he moves in to hug him, and draws him towards the bed in the same motion. he gathers him up, arms tight. ]

No. Stop, don't say that. This isn't your fault, it...

This thing that's happening, this game. It's meant to divide us, and it's working. Louis was trying to protect Lestat. Alina has no more proof it was him than Koby had that it was you.

( deep stupid fucking breaths he shouldn't need if his body wasn't such a betrayal to him right now.

he shudders. nods. rethinks what she said. ) It is all a guess to assign motivation to why Louis would have done it. ( he worries his fangs over his lips. ) I wouldn't blame Louis if that girl had begged him to end her pain and he'd only given her what she wanted.

But I also wouldn't doubt Louis if he said that it was all just theory.

[ dani strokes the tears from his face, then pulls him close again, hands sliding over his back. ]

I don't believe it was Louis. He values life too much. Alina told a story, but brought no proof beyond her own conviction. Other people's faith isn't enough for me.

[ a pause. ]

It's Caroline, isn't it? The girl.

[ she's the one who'd called him, caring about lexi. she'd come to their room with food, she'd wanted to help. there's honestly no one else he imagines it could be. ]

( ugh he didn't even think about how easy it would be for Dani to put it all together. she is the newest, youngest, and blond person he's been spending more time with.

finally he nods. ) I'm sorry. Not only did she ask I not tell anyone, which I would never do regardless, but she specifically begged I not tell you. She was afraid it would change the way you looked at her.

[ dani only nods, and sighs. ]

She was right to be cautious. I wish I'd been more cautious.

[ gently, he wipes the red stains from lexi's cheeks. ]

She's sweet, innocent. She reminds me of Raisa.

I'm so sorry.

[ once the votes are cast, and alia and lucifer are taken away, dani comes to lexi. it's after dark. he takes his hand. ]

Come to the gardens with me.

( after the other two are led away, Lexi follows Dani out into the gardens. )

We shouldn't be out here. We could be attacked.

[ dani knows that's true.

he doesn't care. ]

We won't stay long. I need to talk to you where no one else can hear, so tell me. Are we properly alone?

[ this isn't for the ears of other vampires, is his implication, whether they're allies or not. this isn't for anyone's ears. ]

( Lexi listens out. then reaches out to feel and pulls.

he nods. )

Yes we are alone for now.

What do you need to talk about?

[ dani takes his hand. ]

Lexi, the girl whose blood was gone. And the boy who walked into a lake without a fight. The wounded people, it...

[ he sighs. ]

Have you thought about how likely a killer you would seem if they knew what your blood powers could do?

Alia's compulsion, it was the strongest argument against her. But your power would work just as well.

( Lexi sighs. ) I did consider if it was me. Like they said, the house may make us do it.

The boy at least they said was a skinny blonde. Does seem to really fit Alia, unfortunately.

I... don't know that I couldn't our wouldn't have done any of the other kills.

... I could have been capable of several of them. ( he glances at Dani. )

[ dani's face pinches with urgency. ]

No one can know.

That power, Lexi, please. Promise me, you won't tell anyone. The things I told Koby...

[ his teeth set. he remembers that conversation like he'd remember a nightmare. he's replayed it in his head so many times the things he said. the things he wishes he hadn't. why hadn't he just lied? ]

We can't trust these people. Not properly. And I don't care how nice their dungeons are, I can't have you locked away so they can decide on whatever punishment. Anyone might turn against you. So anything they don't already know, they can't. Especially something like those powers.

( he wants to argue it, but Alina came so close to saying Caroline's name. Dani could figure it out. others might just as easily from what she said.

so who's to say anyone will protect his secret if it means protecting people they care about more than him? that's painful to think about. he doesn't want to test the theory.

so he nods. )

The voice inside me has always told me to keep it quiet.

I won't reveal it now. I don't know if I'll ever tell anyone here. It's been i've 200 years. What's another few odd years?

[ dani comes close to him, taking his hand. ]

I'm so sorry for asking you to hide it. You shouldn't have to.

But I think the voice is right. I wish I hadn't told people as much as I have. I can't take that back now, but I can avoid saying more.

We should speak, at your convenience, given recent events.

Considering I'm intending to avoid the center of the storm as much as possible, currently is convenient for me.

Would you come to my rooms, or would you prefer I go to yours? Alicent is my suitemate, but she is a friend to our kind.

While I wholly trust Alicent, Dani is feeling a little protective of me currently. I don't think he wants me going too far from him right now. I'm in [insert room nearish Louis and Armand].

Your Dani is certainly entitled to his worry.

[ with his own mental abilities restricted as they are, he doesn't believe armand will be able to sense him near, and hold any suspicion as a result. ]

I will be there imminently.

The door is open. No need to knock.

[ Of course Lestat already knows which room Louis and Armand are inhabiting — he'd made it a point to know, back when he was respectfully maintaining the distance they'd agreed upon prior to his leaving Paris, and while he has yet to cross the threshold, has only welcomed Louis into his room by comparison, he remains helplessly aware of how little space remains between them while they've all been guests of this strange manor house.

Their collective inability to delve into minds — at least, he suspects it's collective, because if Lestat himself has been met with a pounding headache for his efforts, no doubt Armand and Louis have suffered the same — means that his closer proximity can remain unnoticed, at least for now, as he finds the room Alexei had indicated and lets himself in without further preamble.

He's dressed for remaining in his own rooms — a long dressing gown, loose and belted around his middle, slippers on his feet — and his expression is relaxed, but intent, as he crosses the space to assume a seat in the nearest open chair. ]

I suspect you might already know why I wished to meet.

( Lexi still hasn't sorted out the relationship with Lestat, Louis, and Armand. so honestly, he's not aware if there would be any discomforting coming near them. but he does wonder at Lestat not being close to them.

he's not nosy, though. oh that's a lie. he is. but only for gossip freely shared. he would never pry.

either way he's asked Dani to at least go to the adjoined room while Lestat visits in case Lestat prefers the privacy. when Lestat does arrive the room is very clearly barely lived in. it's only temporary quarters until this whole thing is over.

and as usual, Lexi is stricken by the inexorable beauty of the vampire. a shame they have more pressing matters at hand. ) An alliance of some sort? A plot? ( Lexi is dressed comfortably, too. an open kimono and loose, flowing style pants of a thin, soft material. ) I'm open to anything, at this point.

[ It is not Lestat's priority to remark on the space, or the room, but he does observe its sparse state, a potential indication that it has only been occupied for a short time.

His mirrored gaze, a piercing blue that possesses an otherworldly quality in the way that all vampires of his world do, briefly sweeps over their surroundings before returning to the figure before him. There is no question about it — Alexei is objectively beautiful, with an artful degree to his features that would easily inspire many a muse. No wonder, he thinks, that the vampire has inspired such deep loyalty from one who seems to be human; he doesn't need to lend much effort at all to be able to hear his heartbeat through the wall. ]

The former. [ Though he hasn't lent serious thought, yet, to the latter, and as suspicions only mount against them, it may be necessary for them to take more decisive measures. Lestat leans back in his chair, idly crossing one leg over the other. ]

All of us who are called vampire were exposed through that indiscreet feast, whether we sought it or not. [ For his part, Lestat still suspects Armand for having orchestrated the entire thing, and can't completely repress a slight sneer. ] Since then, we have become easy scapegoats for the humans to blame whenever it's the least bit convenient.

[ He leans forward slightly, one hand braced against the arm of the seat, fingers curving slightly until the points of his nails are digging subtly into the fabric. ] In my world, vampires often form covens, but those are ruled over by one leader. An authority. I would not seek to replicate that so precisely here. I propose that we all rely on each other, if necessary. Especially if the humans decide they no longer tolerate our presence here.

( in all honesty, Lexi would have wanted an alliance before now. he hates to say this, but he misses his community of vampires. he hates not being surrounded in his own kind. even worse now that they've become targets. he's had to measure his steps in ways he never did before. he hates that feeling more than he can explain.

but now? he has no desire to balk at the concept. )

It was disturbing to se how quickly they all pointed to us. One name at a time. One story or another to fit their accusations. ( Lexi sighs, letting his head fall back against the headboard of the bed he's resting on. ) I would like to join this alliance you propose. I would like to protect you and the others. To have others I can rely on as well. ( something he hasn't had in centuries... )

I would also ask the girl Louis referred to be included in our protection.

[ Alexei has no way of knowing what Lestat's distaste of covens truly stems from — or that it's mostly wrapped up in Armand himself, and what transpired between them in the years long before he first traveled to New Orleans and met a young, aspirational businessman in Storyville. If he were any younger, he would not have even entertained the thought of forging alliances with other vampires, let alone those not even of their world — but desperate times and all that.

He reclines as well, definitively lounging back in his chair, but his gaze is casually observant, drinking in the view of the other vampire with something that falls more in line with appraisal. ]

Mademoiselle Forbes. A tragedy, abandoned by her sire in the manner that she was. [ In the manner that Lestat himself was, although he doesn't go as far as to allude to what occurred with Magnus. ] Yes, her as well. Any others you would propose? Your human, perhaps?

( oh good. he does already know Caroline's name. that makes things easier. it isn't just that she'd been abandoned by her sire, he hates that too. but it's that she's alone her. no vampires from her home. no friends at all from there. she's too young to be left to fend for herself.

he nods his head. ) I don't know how the others might feel about him being mortal, but he cares for Louis as deeply as I do. And he'll stand with me regardless. I would prefer if I'm called on to protect those cared for by others in the alliance, Dani would be given similar protection in my absence.

What of Alicent? Will this alliance be only vampires and a select others? Or will it extend to Alicent and those she allies with? ( how big will this get? )

[ Not only does Lestat feel a pang of sympathy for Caroline's plight, but, if he allows himself long enough to dwell on it, he becomes much closer to enraged. A young vampire, only months old, should not be left to their own devices, not when there are important lessons to be taught, guidance she must be given.

Still, Alexei raises a fair point, and Lestat rises to stand as the other vampire puts forth other names, pacing forward by a few steps as he brings a hand to his mouth in visible contemplation. ]

Alicent has already agreed to ally with both Louis and myself, though that agreement was struck long before this game began. [ Out of all the humans here, he can rely on her not to turn on them even after being made aware of their true nature. ] I would consider her a part of this... circle, for lack of a better term. Just as your Dani would be named.

[ When he turns again, to look in Alexei's direction, his gaze is insistent. ]

I would not see vampire pitted against vampire, when we are already at a disadvantage by sheer numbers alone and have made every effort to exist as peaceably as possible. Whoever can be trusted by one of us should be counted.

( Lexi lets Lestat cook through his thought process on how to handle outside alliances. it's not that he doesn't trust Alicent wholly, he really does. he just wants to know the details of this alliance prospect. he doesn't want conflicting allegiances should someone else decide their conflicting alliance trumps the alliance struck within the game.

so he nods his head. )

I see nothing wrong with your sentiment. And I stand with you on it. I'd prefer not to watch us all named, scrutinized, and made into monsters at every turn.

I'll agree to your alliance.

To be clear, I have no intention of abandoning this once their game has ended. I would have gladly remained outside of it, had I not been named, and you, and Louis shortly thereafter.

[ But now, his hand has been forced, and as suspicions rise, the likelihood of their being judged, and blamed, and trussed up without reasonable cause only grows. ]

And I would rather make allies of our kind, whatever our differences may be, than enemies.

[ He presses his lips together — tempered, somewhat, by Alexei’s assent — and then reaches to begin rolling up the sleeve of his dressing gown. ]

Let us seal our agreement properly, then. In blood.

( Lexi is a bit surprised to hear the offer extends past the game. not because he disagrees with it, but because he was just unprepared for it.

but he does agree with it. in fact, he's grateful for it. the more he's in the presence of people like Louis and Lestat, the more he feels like himself. he'd never say as much to Dani, but he feels a bit restricted at times. forced to temper who and what he is in this place to be more palatable. and even that's not been enough for them.

so it's a nice feeling to not be in the presence of one he has to play games for outside his own romance.

and when that wrist is bared, offered to seal their deal in blood the way only vampires do, Lexi is off the bed. he crosses the room in a flash, taking the offered wrist. he's so close to Lestat now. so close to the scent that rolls off him, those piercing blue eyes, that sensual tone, and the feeling of his wrist beneath his thumb as he presses the pad of his thumb there.

he tilts his head away from his wrist, though he still holds it in one hand. his other hand comes up to brush back those hold curls that got Lestat in trouble with little else to blame, and brushes his fingers over his neck as he leans closer. ) May I?

[ Truth be told, Lestat has been considering this move since the night of the feast — banding together with the other vampires, strengthening their link, not to assert himself over them but to have an assurance of fewer foes in this house. Many of the humans still can’t be trusted, but he would sooner throw his lot in with those who know what it is like to be exposed against their will.

From a distance, across a dinner table or the span of the room between them now, Alexei is a pleasure to look at; up close, he’s striking, features both delicate and strong. Lestat is a bit surprised to be met where he stands so quickly, but only because it affords him a better opportunity to look over the other vampire from this adjusted proximity.

Better still is Alexei’s choice, bypassing Lestat’s wrist to suggest drinking from his throat instead. He won’t disguise the brief frisson that elicits, the manner in which his gaze darkens and his own fangs visibly elongate. In response, he stretches out the hand that the other vampire isn’t currently holding in his grasp, fingers sliding beneath dark hair, over nape — then cupping, to draw Alexei in, guide him. ]

Be my guest. [ Lestat tilts his head ever so slightly, clear invitation visible; his thumb strokes over the edge of Alexei’s jaw. Moments like this, brimming with anticipation just before the feed, are hypnotic in their own right. ]

They're going to blame you again

[ by they she means specifically the same people since that ginger girl was attacked. ]

Ridiculously so, yes. I have evidence I reached out to Koby and Nami and promised no retaliation. If anyone will take that as enough reason not to accuse me.

I'm not sure grief listens to reason.

I don't fear being imprisoned, if I'm honest. I'd even let them lock me up to feel better. It's that I know that means a true killer will be free still. And Dani will be more in danger without me.

Yeah

[ if dani weren't involved caroline would genuinely suggest snapping lexi's neck (she would need a stool and he would get back up eventually) so he couldn't be accused again and force people to use their heads. ]

Do you want to borrow my ring?

Would it work for me?

I don't see why not.

Bonnie didn't even want to make it for me but it works perfectly for me despite that. You can always test it with a finger or something.

That's... really kind of you, Caroline. My world doesn't even have a sun. It's hard to see it from the corners of windows. I would like to see it outside and feel it even just once briefly.

Maybe that is why it hurts you, because you don't have one.

I took it off to see if the sun would burn me without it but I was okay so now it is just a reminder I don't really want.

I'm glad to hear the sun didn't burn you. It seems the house has given you a better turn here. But you're likely right. That does seem to be one of the most differing aspects of my world to others.

Do you have a moon? Dani said you have a friend who is a werewolf. I've been wondering how that works if there is no sun for them.

No. We have neither. The wolves came before the sun and moon died. I don't know what they might have been then, but they're still fairly formidable now. They do still call on the sun god, Luninor, still as well.

I have a werewolf friend too. He can only turn into a wolf when the moon is full, just like in the stories.

It's honestly for the best! The transformation is really brutal. I couldn't bear watching Tyler suffer.

The transformation was painful? If it's painful for the wolves I've my world, they've never said as much. In fact, the wolves I know prefer to change as often as possible.

It was like he was breaking all his bones, over and over, for hours the first time. Now it's faster but it's still excruciating.

[ he reeks of pain when he transforms back, but caroline bears it for the cuddles. ]

I know you and yours haven't a cause to trust me. Hell, I wouldn't.

But — and it's an olive branch 'cause we're all stuck here together — if you and yours come out of this harassed and harangued more than Louis already hinted at being — we can talk, yeah? I hate the thought that they're all just cycling through you guys, hoping to catch you out. It's shitty.

I'm sending this to the other vampires, too. Just let me know you got the message.

[ local vampire hater hates bullies more :) ]

Edited 2024-10-12 22:02 (UTC)

lexi i can't stay near armand.

i love louis, i want to be near him, i trust him, its not about him.

i can't live near armand.

so if you want to, if you feel safer with him, that's okay. but i have to go, then, okay? i'm not asking you to choose. but i'm going back to our old room today.

Edited 2024-10-15 09:25 (UTC)

what's brought this on?

he called me cattle.

[ also there was the whole fang flashing which definitely seemed a threat-

but what he said was enough. ]

( Lexi closes his eyes and sighs audibly. )

I'll get us packed.

i can do it

[ he already is, he wants to be gone by the time armand and louis come back.

he feels bad about it, though, he knows lexi feels safe here and wants to be close to them. of course he does, why wouldn't he? armand wouldn't talk like that to him. ]

lexi, you don't have to go with me. i'm not asking you to choose, i understand wanting to be near them. theyre your people.

Your Highness. I mislike to call upon your friendship with mine mother for a task that puts your abilities to risk, but if you will hear me, it could — should we succeed — aid in finding justice for mine nephew, now twice murdered.

Have you the time to spare?

Lexi. Not your highness. And I do suppose I have a certain skill for this kind of thing. ( more than the average vampire, but he doesn't need to explain that. )

Yeah, I'm happy to help.

[ to business, then. ]

I appreciate your generosity. We needs look for my nephew's body. The parts of him that are currently unaccounted for, specially his head.

If nothing else, it will give my half-sister some comfort to have her son made whole in death. Will you need anything of me?

You'll be able to stomach if we find his head? I'd prefer not to have to catch you fainting. I would also prefer you not talk to anyone about how I work. Your mother being the exception. I trust her. I'm from a different world to most of the other vampires and some things work differently for me, like not being able to go out in the sun. But also I have different advantages natural to my kind in my world. And I would prefer to keep those more private. Especially after recent events.

Edited (blame typos on my new nails) 2024-10-21 14:32 (UTC)

I've had mine own eye pulled from my head. Seen it plain as it was, gored and torn apart by knife and pincers. My home is a place where men are eviscerated frequently for their crimes, and men's heads are set upon pikes for their offences against the crown.

I will not faint, Lexi. Mother has herself given her leave and approval that I should do this.

You have my word and my discretion. Should anyone find out about your skills, it will not be my tongue that looses the words.

( someone is so extra.... )

Good to hear. Then it would be best we start at the torso. I'll need to be able to pick out the scent of his blood specifically, and it will be easier to do if I get his scent fresh. Especially as I've never spoken with him before now anyway.

[ 🔥🩸🔪🐉🔥🩸🔪🐉🔥🩸🔪🐉🔥🩸🔪🐉 ]

Mm, I know the way to the morgue, if you've not visited it yet. They may have cleaned the floors, but his body and other salvaged parts remain in good condition.

Shall I come fetch you?

It'll be enough. And yes, I'd appreciate it. I've not made my way to the morgue yet.

Tell me where to find you and I will be there within the hour.

[ oh, as an aside— ]

Have you fed?

You are Daniil's Alexei, yes?

Yes, but just call me Lexi. You're the god he's been speaking with? Set?

Lexi, then.

I am the same god, yes. I had something to ask you, if you do not mind hearing me out.

I don't mind hearing a question. But I don't guarantee I'll answer it.

Your team is currently the most likely to win, in the end. Numbers alone, you know.

If you do not want it nor think you would use it, would you be willing to give ME your prizeright?

( .... lexi genuinely laughs out loud at the question. )

How many other pinks have you asked?

Only you?

[ yes that's set, house jester ( squeaks his clown nose ).... ]

I'm sure. All right. If I can't find a use for it and Dani doesn't want it, you'll be next. But I make no guarantees I won't want it.

I definitely want it more! I will fight to the end for it.

Do consider. Bye bye!

[ sometime after matt's demise, dani comes to find lexi in the library. he's red-eyed and looks agitated, but doesn't say much. he sits beside him, and slides the note over in front of him. ]

I can only get...half of this, maybe, and I don't want to ask anyone else.

What does it say?

( he saw the post. he isn't happy, either, with what happened with Matt, but he knows it's hitting Dani harder.

he takes the note, reads it out loud as Dani sits. )

Are you okay?

[ dani shakes his head. no, he's absolutely not. ]

He thought of...that. The journals, helping us.

This was all supposed to be over, Pierce just couldn't let it go. I hate them.

Them?

Pierce.

Whatever force it is that brought us here and got us to start killing each other.

I was happy. For five minutes, things seemed good, and then they just turned into this.

[ are you having a peaceful evening? are you enjoying the sights and sounds of saltburnt? well, congratulations on finding a new companion tonight: this dog, with glowing hell eyes and fire collar and a stinky sulfuric perfume wafting along with her. if you step away from her, she will follow. if you move towards her, she will step back. just a little dance-y dance for about a few minutes before she decides she's had enough and leaves.

she knows you now. time to report back to her human. ]

[ he's in bed one night, waiting for lexi to join him. he's been tense all day, likely for a couple of days, and hadn't been forthcoming about why. but now, when lexi leaves the bathroom, dani sits up straight, and says it like he's just desperate to get the words out. ]

I think I'm ready.

[ ... ]

For biting. I mean, I want you to.

[ sometime during the holiday season, wrapped in red and gold paper, tidily and well done because grace enlisted some of the staff to help her, a gift is delivered to lexi's door along with just so many flowers. so many! one box bears a chess set and the other a leather journal. ]

Lexi,

Now we have no excuse not to learn to play chess since we can do it inside in our pajamas. Happy holidays!

Love, Grace

( wrapped in sleek paper, alina manages to wriggle her way into lexi's room while he's out elsewhere. a stack of presents waits for him on his bed: a box of macabre chocolates up to the standards of alina's sweet tooth, two necklaces filled with an unidentifiable red liquid, and finally, an unwrapped hand mirror, glinting ruby ring, and a letter sealed with a gem. it reads, )

For the man who loves to admire his reflection,

Uncork the bottles and drink the potion inside. The liquid inside should protect you from the sun for an hour or two, so you no longer have to brood in the dark. I know it's not ideal weather for it, but you should be able to bask in the daylight with the rest of us.

Thank you for being my friend, even when I made it difficult for you to be.

(PS: Can vampires eat chocolate? If they can't, you know where to find me to share.)

☀️ Alina

Edited 2024-12-09 17:46 (UTC)

[Alia’s gift is wrapped somewhat clumsily in brown paper, likely taken from the kitchens, and taped excessively to ensure it’s secure. Inside, resting in sparkly, star-studded tissue paper:

A black parasol, enchanted to keep off the sun's rays, despite it's apparent flimsiness.

A smooth-polished rock from the lake (yes, everyone gets a rock) with the gift-receiver’s initials carefully carved into it (with what? Don’t worry about it.)

A business card for Sol & Scroll, because if you aren’t patronizing it, you should be.

There’s also a note, scribbled on notebook paper stolen from Alina (sorry, babe):

Alexei -

To keep you from sparkling and revealing your secrets.

Thank you for your visit, in the cells.

I will not forget your kindness.

- Alia

[ neatly wrapped and tied with a wide white satin ribbon are a stack of boxes left just outside lexi & dani's door. half the boxes are labeled for alexei and inside he will find:

a box of chocolate covered strawberries on ice

a dozes butterscotch chip cookies, homemade

a copy of dracula

caroline's own daylight ring

the note reads in perfectly neat penmanship, which she got an A for in 3rd grade, ]

The chocolates are mostly for Dani so share with him before you take a spin in the sunlight with him.

Love Caroline

𝖘𝖆𝖑𝖙𝖇𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖙 𝖎𝖓𝖇𝖔𝖝.

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